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It took me eight years to move from high school graduation to college graduation. I wasn't all that focused, and I just didn't have the finances. But more than that, I didn't really know what I wanted to do with my life.
At first, I wanted to be an electrical engineer. A semester of EE classes at Michigan Tech talked me out of that. Then I thought maybe I'd be a musician. My folks talked me out of that. Then I took some time off -- a couple of years, living in Mexico, working in Houston, designing cable TV systems in the UP of Michigan, dreaming about floating down the Mississippi in a raft.
Finally, I buckled down and went back to college, a nearby state university, and completed degrees in English and Spanish. Still feeling unprepared to enter to working world, and still unmarried, I went to grad school in Virginia and spent another four years earning a couple more degrees.
Throughout the entire educational process, my vision for what I wanted to do with my life fluctuated. At one point, I even considered law school. But in retrospect, I can see how the Lord guided my decisions to bring me to where I am at this moment, as editor of Boundless writing a blog post on college and career.
I bring all this up because of an e-mail I received earlier today from a Boundless reader. He's given me permission to excerpt it here:
I am an undeclared sophmore in college at South Dakota State University. For the past two years I have prayed for God to guide me in the right direction, just show me where He wants me. I have made little progress in the past two years.
Now that I have completed all my generals, it comes time to choose a major. I have tried to get a good grasp on my skills, but feel that I do not stand out in any category. I am at a crossroads; do I stay in school aimlessly or leave school for who knows how long and lose my scholarships? I continue to pray for guidance, but like I say little progress has been made.
I am on my last straw. I hope that you can either help me out or suggest to me some other route to get what I am looking for.
Reading this e-mail, I'm reminded of something Boundless author Jenny Schroedel wrote for a forthcoming article:
If you're not sure what to do next, consider Frederick Buechner's advice. He says to search for your vocation at "the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet." You know you've found your own deep gladness when you lose track of time when you're engaged in your work. You know you've found work that meets the needs of an aching world when you discover ways that your work can bring comfort, help or healing to others.
My educational journey was pretty unintentional, pretty ambiguous. I'm encouraged that the Lord worked within my aimlessness. For most, though, I think it'd be helpful to seek clarity about "the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet."
I want to open this up to you. I want to hear how you've come to discern your vocation, how you've made decisions about what to study in college. Maybe you took a variety of classes outside your declared major, in order to see what resonated with you. Maybe you took time off to work. Maybe you took tests or asked advice from mentors. Maybe you're still unsure about what to pursue. Whatever it is, please share your educational and vocational journey with us.
So reads a caption in the recent cover story of Time titled "The State of the American Woman."
Being a woman, and an American, I thought this might make for some interesting reading. After all, I'd like to know my state.
For the article, Time collaborated with the Rockefeller Foundation to conduct a "landmark study of gender attitudes in a changing economy." It was under these poll results that I saw the caption.
"Working Mothers Are Broadly Accepted ..." read one caption listing the following findings (and the "..." was theirs, not mine):
Seventy-four percent of men and 84% of women say women with children are just as committed to their jobs as women without children. Seventy-two percent of black women strongly agree vs. 57% of Latino women and 55% of white women.
Fifty-six percent of men and 63% of women strongly disagree with the idea that mothers cannot be as productive at work as fathers. This isn't to say there are no trade-offs: 25% of men and 26% of women say that women who work outside the home have less time and attention for their marriage or relationship. And men and women differ over the cost: 26% of men strongly agree that it is harder for a mother who works outside the home to establish a warm and secure relationship with her children than it is for a mother who does not work outside the home; 19% of women strongly agree.
Then the next caption read: "... And Yet, People Hold on to Traditional Visions for Family Life." It then listed these findings:
In the 1970s, a majority of children grew up with a stay-at-home parent; now that figure is less than a third. A large majority -- 70% of men, 61% of women -- believe this has had a negative effect on society. Fifty-seven percent of men and 51% of women agree that it is better for a family if the father works outside the home and the mother takes care of the children. Asked to rank what they value most for their own daughters, 63% of men and 56% of women put a happy marriage with children first; 17% of men and 23% of women said an interesting career; and 15% of men and 20% of women said financial success.
Acknowledging that polls aren't the Word, I found this fascinating. In other sections of the poll, the majority of Americans responded that women working was a positive thing for society, that they are comfortable with a family where a woman earns more than a man and they reject the notion that "women need to behave more like men to be taken seriously in the workplace."
Still, there's that "and yet ..."
It's as if we all understand that both men and women are capable and intelligent. They can do many of the same jobs. Women can do some of them better. But, when the blessing of children comes, what then? Just because women can perform just as well in the workplace, does that mean it's best for her, for the family and for the kids?
The majority of Americans don't seem to think so.
Also interesting to me was the priorities Americans had for their daughters. Overwhelmingly, they wanted them to have a happy marriage with children. Yet, is that the message we're sending? Are we teaching our daughters and young women how to have fulfilling marriages? Or do we emphasize education and career and just hope that their family lives will fall into place?
Get ready for a closeup: your next job interview might be on webcam.
Or so says a recent Time article, "How Skype is Changing the Job Interview."The article goes on:
Looking to save time and money, companies are turning to video-chat software as a cheap, low-hassle way to vet job candidates. That means a growing number of people looking for work are meeting their prospective new bosses not at the office but in the comfort of their own home.
It lists some tips for getting the most out of a Skype interview:
- Get your barking dog out of range before you start the interview. (On that note, I have a really funny story about phone interviewing a U.S. Congressman while barracaded in my bedroom. Babies can be loud, even while playing contentedly. I'll tell it sometime.)
- Make sure there is no bright light behind you (especially an open window, makes you look dark and creepy).
- When answering a question, look directly at the camera, not the screen -- this gives the appearance of "eye contact".
- Avoid wearing white (white draws attention and you want them drawn to the white of your eyes and teeth).
- Remember what's behind you in the frame (no mess, no Godfather movie posters, you get the idea).
- Don't sit too close to the camera (we don't want any inadvertant nostril shots; best to see your face and the top three buttons or so of your shirt--do a dry run with a friend first to make sure everything looks good).
- Remember it's still a job interview (you may get away with pajama bottoms, but at least be professional looking from the waist up).
It seems to me it has its pros and cons. It might add just another layer of pressure to an already adrenalined situation (Will I have some freak wi-fi meltdown? Can I adjust my legs or will I move out of the shot?). But it also might help my potential employer (and me) expedite the hiring process.
What about you? Have you ever webcammed an interview? Would you want to?
Jobs fell more than expected in the US last month. The unemployment rate now stands at 9.8%, worst since 1983. And according to the data from the Labor Department, it's hitting singles the hardest. Here's an article fleshing out the data and some reasons why it's so disparate when compared to married couples:
Singles are feeling much of the pain. Single employment fell 4.8 percentage points from December 2007 through June, the study says. Married employment dropped just 3.1 percentage points.
In August, the single jobless rate was 13.5% vs. 6.3% for married people, Labor says.
Several forces are at work. Married men are more likely to take a new job at lower pay than their single counterparts to support children and a wife, says study author Howard Wall, an economist at the St. Louis Fed. Singles also tend to be younger and have less education and experience than those who are married.
I also wonder if employers look for reasons to keep married people over singles because they're often responsible for a family. As I've written previously, singles are best able to absorb a job loss. It's probably why they're unwilling to take a new job with lower pay.
Seriously, I could live a week on the quarters between my couch cushions if I was the only one I had to worry about. Couldn't you?
There's been a lot of talk lately about modern women being unhappy.
The most recent is Maureen Dowd's New York Times article, "Blue is the New Black." In it, Dowd writes:
According to the General Social Survey, which has tracked Americans’ mood since 1972, and five other major studies around the world, women are getting gloomier and men are getting happier. Before the ’70s, there was a gender gap in America in which women felt greater well-being. Now there’s a gender gap in which men feel better about their lives.
What's the deal, Dowd wonders. Women have broken out of our "domestic cocoons" (her words). We've left our mothers' "circumscribed lives behind." Why aren't we happy?
"[T]he more women have achieved," she writes, "the more they seem aggrieved. Did the feminist revolution end up benefiting men more than women?"
Perhaps men are happier because women still have the "second shift" (more housework and child care to do after the work day is over)? Probably not, Dowd writes. Though women still do more of each, the "trend lines are moving toward more parity, which should make [women] less stressed."
Dowd offers a few possible solutions to the "paradox," then focuses on one in particular: kids.
One area of extreme distraction is kids. "Across the happiness data, the one thing in life that will make you less happy is having children," said Betsey Stevenson, an assistant professor at Wharton who co-wrote a paper called "The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness." "It’s true whether you’re wealthy or poor, if you have kids late or kids early. Yet I know very few people who would tell me they wish they hadn’t had kids or who would tell me they feel their kids were the destroyer of their happiness."
The more important things that are crowded into their lives, the less attention women are able to give to each thing.
Here's what that last line (read it again, would you?) got me thinking of: rocks. Stephen Covey, well-known author of the The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, has a "rock theory." Boiled down, the theory goes like this: Your life is bucket. Put the big rocks in first, then the little rocks, then the sand, then the water. It all fits. So, know what the big rocks in your life are and start there.
What I've found is that my kids are the rocks in my life. I think you will find that, by your desire and by God's design, your kids will become the rocks in your life as well. They are a joy and they are a reward. But they are also very hard work. The very nature of raising kids demands time.
Before I had kids, I was able to juggle some pretty big boulders. A full-time career. An hour-long commute. But when my daughter came along, I realized that a choice had to be made. Would I give up some of the other rocks in my life or would I try to now cram them all in the jar together? Though it involved some serious financial and lifestyle sacrifices, I gave up some of the other rocks in my life. And I've never been sorry.
I still work, obviously. But my work has the flexibility to be a small rock, the sand or even, at times, the water (you probably didn't notice, but there was a serious lack of Heather articles this summer over at Boundless), depending on what my family and I need.
Other moms know the stress of having too many rocks. In fact, 79 percent of all moms (working outside the home or not) say that working full-time when you have children is not ideal.
Owen Strachan writes this:
Modern women are unhappy. Feminism is not working. It is the call of the church of Jesus Christ to image the kind of happy (though by no means easy) life of the biblical home. We do so not merely as a means of witness, in these strange days, but as a means of rescue.
I know that there are a few working moms who read this blog. Who feel that, because of decisions or circumstances, their work has to be a major rock in their life. Please know that no one here at Boundless, including me, is judging you or condemning you.
But I don't want to equivocate either. For those of you looking down life's road to future children, there are things you can do now to give yourself flexibility in the future. I hope you'll consider it. 79 percent of women, including me, are trying to tell you something.
Two years ago, half of American college graduates had job offers in hand before they finished school, according to the National Association of Colleges and Employers. Not bad.
Last year, not so good. For the grads of 2008, only one-quarter had job offers in hand as they donned caps and gowns. This year, it's dropped even further. Only one-fifth of 2009 college graduates knew where they would be working at graduation. An article at MSNBC states that the numbers for 2010 graduates will be even worse.
Throw in the fact that the July unemployment rate for Americans age 20 to 24 was 15.3 percent (compared to 9.4 percent overall), and prospects can look pretty dim.
So what's a college grad without a job to do? Sue her alma mater?
For some, the answer is more school. The article states: "In a survey of college students by The Associated Press and the college TV network mtvU, nearly 1 in 5 said in May that they had changed their plans this year and expected to attend graduate or professional school because they feared that an undergraduate degree wouldn’t be enough to secure a job. ...“Recessions often inspire people to look to law school to ride out the storm, transition into a new field or broaden their education to make themselves a more attractive candidate,” said Jeff Thomas, [Kaplan's] director of pre-law programs."
If that grad school is cash-on-the-barrel, it's possible that additional education may put some candidates into jobs. But if they're taking on debt (especially if they have already accumulated significant college loans), it could be that their "fear" finds them going from the frying pan into the fire.
For those passing on grad school, there is some advice, though not necessarily pleasant to hear: - Get some serious skills.The featured grad in the MSNBC article who was still looking for work had an English major with minors in Spanish and Bible. This caused one commenter to quip, "I think I see the problem."
The days of kids coming out of college with liberal arts degrees that want to make $50,000 to $60,000 or even $40,000 to $45,000” are over, one recruiting exec told MSNBC. So, if you are getting a degree that is not field-specific, acquire skills and/or experience that are field-specific. Of course, if you've already graduated, you may need to ... - Look several rungs down the ladder.“You have to start at the bottom,” the recruiting exec said, “We’re kind of back to the ’50s and the ’60s — start in the mailroom and work your way up.” So, we all need to can the entitlement when looking for employment.
And don't forget some classic advice from our bloggers (actually, they are all from Motte; learn from Motte, readers) ...
As an individual living in a generally free society like the United States, have you ever thought about exactly what you deserve in terms of rights and privileges?
Are free speech and freedom of worship enough? Are public roads and police protection satisfactory?
Those things were enough for our forefathers, but if you're like many Americans today, you want -- expect -- more.
A whole lot more.
Whether you realize it or not, you've probably come to expect sufficient food and clothing, a roof over your head, maybe even government-funded health care. (None of which are actually guaranteed, at least not yet.)
And if you are Trina Thompson of the Bronx, you expect just a wee bit more.
You see, after Thompson spent $70,000 on college tuition, she expected New York's Monroe College to help get her a job, and to do so pretty darn quick. How quick? Well, when Thompson was still unemployed nearly three months after graduation, she decided that it was time to sue the school for failing to fulfill her employment expectations.
That's right. Thompson is suing Monroe College for $72,000. That's $70,000 for the cost of tuition, with another $2,000 for the stress of not landing a job.
Never mind that Thompson's academic credentials (2.7 GPA) weren't exactly top-notch. Never mind that the school's job placement office gave Thompson equal access to its e-recruiting Web site, through which she was able to contact potential employers. And never mind that the U.S. economy is in a recession, or that thousands of other college graduates have remained unemployed for far, far longer than Thompson.
According to Thompson's legal complaint, those reasons simply don't cut it:
The office of career advancement information technology counselor did not make sure their Monroe e-recruiting clients call their graduates that recently finished college for an interview to get a job placement. They have not tried hard enough to help me.
Forgive me if I'm not understanding, but it sounds like she not only expected these clients to notice that she had just graduated, but to actually contact her directly and request an interview. (And for all these years I thought it was the job-seeker's role to go after an interview!)
Even if you were less-than-pleased with your college experience, have you ever considered asking (suing) for your money back? And did you ever consider giving up after a mere three months in the job market?
Is this where our American sense of entitlement has taken us?
(HT: Alex Chediak)
A year before the great mime prophecy of 1998, it was time for me to start looking for my first job. So one of my best friends and I decided to apply at the closest place to our homes — Wal-Mart. We dropped off our applications, and a couple of hours later we got a call from one of the assistant managers asking us to come in that afternoon for an interview.
After my answers to the first few questions convinced them that I was someone they could hire, they got to the tough part of the interview: placement. The thorough and extensive process went like this:
Manager: Do you know anything about hardware?
Me: No, not really.
Manager: Well do you know what a hammer is?
Me: Yeah.
Manager: Ok, hardware department it is.
I went home that day proudly holding my fresh new blue vest.
Now the interviewing manager also had it in his head that I was some sort of genius. Clearly my answer to the hammer question was peculiarly profound. So after a few days of basic training it was time for him to teach me how to mix a can of paint for a customer. He walked me through the process of finding the right paint and putting the right combination of tint in to produce the right color. I'd passed all those steps with flying colors when he then told me to start mixing it.
I closed the lid on the paint can tightly, and then proceeded to pick it up and shake it up and down violently. After a couple of seconds, I un-scrunched my face long enough to find the manager looking at me quite quizzically. I stopped and he said,
"You're kidding, right?"
Suddenly realizing that there was a much stronger machine right next me whose sole purpose was to shake a can of paint, and not wanting to shatter the genius image that had been placed on me, I responded to him with a very confident,
"Yeah, of course."
He looked relieved, and I kept my job.
At some point or another, we're all put in a situation or given an assignment where we feel out of place. We're not always going to have the perfect job where we feel completely comfortable.
But that paint can provided a lesson that I've unfortunately forgotten many many times. The lesson that it's still important for me to give my best to every assignment, even when there's a machine that can do it better.
And I'm realizing that many times it's those uncomfortable or uncertain moments that end up giving you the most challenges to help you grow, the most reasons to make you laugh later on, and apparently the most stories to write about on a blog a dozen years later.
In response to my post "Running Together," one commenter asked:
I've always been under the impression that you love your job and are fulfilled by it: You work for a prominent ministry organization, get to make a living with writing, and meet interesting people as part of a day's work. Do you think this has made singleness easier for you, in terms of feeling like you have a Kingdom purpose in spite of not having a husband?
It seems that one reason singleness is difficult for many is that their jobs are often monotonous and joyless, and finding a new job is *much* easier said than done. In many cases, these circumstances are easier tolerated bv married individuals who have a spouse and/or kids to provide for. Of course, we all have a purpose under God -- no matter what our careers are, no matter what our marital status is -- but singles working in boring corporate jobs to provide only for themselves tend to have to put forth more effort to see this.
I thought this was a great question and one that was worth exploring. First of all, I would readily admit that finding a "good fit" in my career has delivered a sense of satisfaction during the past nine years. I do get to work at something I enjoy and am good at. Because of this, my job is one place I really fit and therefore gain a sense of identity. And, yes, I believe this had made singleness easier in some ways because I'm the successful-at-her-career girl. This even plays out within my family. My brother married young and became "family guy," but I never felt any undue pressure to marry because I was viewed as successful as a person, partly because of my career.
While my job has been one source of satisfaction in my life, there are many others. At the top of my list: my relationship with Jesus Christ, good friends, fun hobbies (improv comedy and running), supportive family and a loving, vibrant church community. So, I wouldn't credit my positive outlook on life or ability to cope with singleness to career satisfaction alone. I would encourage all singles to seek to be satisfied in life, whether they find that satisfaction in their "kingdom purpose," work, friendships, hobbies or church community. Satisfaction has two benefits. First, it makes every season of life more pleasant. Second, a satisfied person is an attractive person.
If you are dissatisfied with every area of life, seek out sources of godly fulfillment. Often it is in these pursuits that you will cross paths with others of a like mind and purpose. In my opinion, a greater sense of fulfillment doesn't have a downside.
I heard on the radio last week that unemployment is higher nationally than it's been in 26 years.
Depressing? Possibly. In the past year I've seen many of my own friends lose their jobs, switch careers, have to move for new employment and even lose houses.
It's hard to stay hopeful and joyful in those circumstances.
In his two-part series "Make the Most of your Unemployment," Michael Lawrence gives advice for how to use your time when you're not on the job. Among his suggestions are volunteering at church, working for free and investing in your family. His articles are packed with practical advice for joblessness that is refreshingly void of daytime TV.
He made a particularly good point about how a Christian's response to unemployment can make an impact on people in the world around him:
Friend, being joyful and hopeful in your unemployment gives you an incredible opportunity to be a walking, talking, pop-up ad for Jesus! People will be sympathetic, but not that interested, in your gloom and anxiety over being unemployed. But hopeful and joyful? That's going to prompt some questions.
So take some of that extra time you have and put it into building relationships with non-Christian friends. Start with your natural interests. Join a running or cycling club. Get involved in your local neighborhood association. Volunteer at the animal shelter. Join a rec league team.
It really doesn't matter what you do. But build relationships and take your absolutely inexplicable hope and joy with you. And then get ready to start explaining where that hope comes from, so that others who don't know Jesus might come to know him and share in your joy too.
Not having a job can create a season of anxiety and despondence. It can also be an opportunity to try new things and tune up other areas of life that may have gone neglected. When you treat unemployment as a spiritual sabbatical, you can reenter the workforce recharged and ready to go. What has been your experience with being unemployed?
As more "information worker" jobs get the axe in a recessionary economy, jobs that tend to put dirt under your fingernails are getting a second look from young workers. Last week, the New York Times Magazine ran a lengthy article on this topic by Matthew Crawford called "The Case for Working With Your Hands." I read quite a bit over the course of a week and I haven't read anything this engaging or provocative in a long time. Here are some appetizers:
Many of us do work that feels more surreal than real. Working in an office, you often find it difficult to see any tangible result from your efforts. What exactly have you accomplished at the end of any given day?
...The imperative of the last 20 years to round up every warm body and send it to college, then to the cubicle, was tied to a vision of the future in which we somehow take leave of material reality and glide about in a pure information economy. This has not come to pass. To begin with, such work often feels more enervating than gliding. More fundamentally, now as ever, somebody has to actually do things: fix our cars, unclog our toilets, build our houses.
...One shop teacher suggested to me that “in schools, we create artificial learning environments for our children that they know to be contrived and undeserving of their full attention and engagement. Without the opportunity to learn through the hands, the world remains abstract and distant, and the passions for learning will not be engaged.”
...The trades suffer from low prestige, and I believe this is based on a simple mistake. Because the work is dirty, many people assume it is also stupid. This is not my experience.
...So managers learn the art of provisional thinking and feeling, expressed in corporate doublespeak, and cultivate a lack of commitment to their own actions. Nothing is set in concrete the way it is when you are, for example, pouring concrete.
...Why not encourage gifted students to learn a trade, if only in the summers, so that their fingers will be crushed once or twice before they go on to run the country?
...For anyone who feels ill suited by disposition to spend his days sitting in an office, the question of what a good job looks like is now wide open.
I suspect this article will hit home with anyone who has looked for purpose among cubicle walls and failed to find anything quite as rewarding as their hands-on projects of days gone by.
Summer is fast approaching. If you're a student, that could mean a break from academics and a time for something else. What that "something else" might be is largely up to you: Will you need to work? Will you be staying with family? Will you take a vacation? Will you set aside some time to play?
In today's featured Boundless article, "You Know What I Did Last Summer," Jason Boyett shares a few things he did this past summer that've changed his life for the better:
Triathlon. Backpacking. Three-day weekends. All three of the activities above involve playing -- as opposed to conventional "work" -- but I think they taught me as much about myself as any college class or business seminar or productivity course I've ever taken. Funny how that happens.
I think back on some of my most cherished summer activities: volunteering in Colombia for a couple of months, working in an industrial laundromat near my dad and stepmother's home, serving as a camp counselor, going on a camping trip.
What've you done? What do you plan to do to make a difference?
Boston.com's "The Female Advantage" suggests an unconventional strategy for companies who want to thrive in these uncertain economic times. Their thesis: "put more women in charge."
"Several studies have linked greater gender diversity in senior posts with financial success," they report. They're not sure why more women in leadership leads to higher profits, suggesting a range of possibilities. In an effort to further promote the benefits, they speculate that more women leaders could result in less corporate crime:
Some analysts even suggest that women might have been able to temper the excesses that led to the current financial crisis. The culprits, one can't help but notice, were overwhelmingly male. More women at the table, some speculate, might have served as a prudent counterweight to reckless, testosterone-addled men.
I'm all for integrity in the workplace. I just don't believe one gender is inherently better -- less sinful -- than the other. It's not sex, that informs good decisions, it's sanctification.
Apparently the authors of this article, and believers in the "women are by nature better than men" school of thought, have never read Genesis or Romans.
When I worked on Capitol Hill, it took me 45 minutes to drive seven miles to my office in D.C. The stop-and-go commute (with a manual transmission no less) contributed to my nervous breakdown, literally. Thankfully, I recovered, and no longer get panic attacks when crossing bridges.
Traffic doesn't affect everyone like that. But it takes a toll to some degree, whether on your nerves or your time or your car insurance. That's why it's listed as a variable on all those best places to live surveys. Here's one with the top ten midsize cities:
The study compared the 124 midsize metros in 20 statistical categories, using the latest U.S. Census Bureau data. The highest scores went to well-rounded places with healthy economies, light traffic, moderate costs of living, impressive housing stocks and strong educational systems.
These are the top 10 midsize metros in terms of quality of life:
1. Provo, Utah
2. Boulder, Colo.
3. Madison, Wis.
4. Bridgeport-Stamford, Conn.
5. Ann Arbor, Mich.
6. Ogden, Utah
7. Fort Collins, Colo.
8. Boise, Idaho
9. Colorado Springs, Colo.
10. Des Moines, Iowa
What's missing from the list of "well-rounded" variables is churches. It's something we often overlook when deciding where to live. But it's at the top of Kevin DeYoung's list from his book "Just Do Something."
You also want to consider the churches available where you are taking a job. Sadly, this is a part of obeying the Scriptures that most Christians rarely consider. Before taking a new job, we look at salary, benefits, school districts, commuting time, and cultural amenities; but if everything else falls into place and there's no good church in the area, it's hard to imagine how God's revealed will — your sanctification — will be well-served.
One of the things we were most excited about when I was offered a job with Focus was joining a church we had attended many times while visiting my wife's family in the Springs. We can attest to the benefits of making it a consideration when deciding where to live. (The traffic's not too bad either.)
What am I called to do? Am I called to the mission field? (And what is "the mission field" anyway?) Am I called to marriage? Am I called to wear a blue shirt today rather than a white one?
Calling.
You know, maybe we overspiritualize that word. Maybe overemotionalize is a more accurate word. I will only go to a particular university if I feel that the Lord is calling me there. I will only pursue Rebecca if I feel that the Lord is calling me to do so. Though Scripture may affirm a particular decision, I will only go after it if I feel a burning in the bosom. And if I feel no particular calling, I'll just maintain the status quo.
Today's Boundless article, "All God's Callings," addresses this theme of calling, leaning heavily on the Latin word for "vocation": vocatio:
Following the Reformation, many Protestants advocated an idea of the Christian life called vocatio, the Latin word which is the source of "vocation." Vocatio is the belief that God calls every Christian to the occupation he is in, whether or not it's related to full-time ministry.
Martin Luther was perhaps the ablest exponent of this concept. To Luther, vocatio meant that each of us has a unique place in the structure of our family, society and occupation whereby we exercise our personal gifts and talents for the glory of God and the benefit of our fellow humanity.
Note that this isn't only about a paying career....
After exploring the theme for a while, the author offers two words of advice:
[First,] Christian parents and certainly Christian churches need to teach students that God calls people to be more than full-time pastors or missionaries to Zimbabwe. He also calls people to be missionaries to public schools, corporate America, social services and the children in their home....
Second, evangelical colleges and campus ministries need to emphasize the importance of the Christian worldview to collegians. Christianity is not something that is compartmentalized when one is singing a worship song, having a quiet time or sharing a Four Spiritual Laws tract with a friend. Christianity is an entire worldview which impacts -- and often transforms -- every aspect of one's life.
Which leaves me with two questions myself:
- How can I know what the Lord is calling me to in the realms of family, society and occupation?
- Can I possibly be satisfied, as a Christ-follower, in a seemingly secular vocation?
With so many job boards on the Internet, it's easy to believe that the best way to score an interview is flood the marketplace with your resume, with or without a cover letter. But I've never gotten anywhere with that scorched earth approach. I've found that prospective employers respond better if you're interest is a bit more sincere. And there's no better way to prove your sincerity than with a well written and informed cover letter.
Here are some tips I found on a job search blog that may give you the edge in scoring that elusive interview:
Pack your P.S. with punch.
Most people immediately jump to the P.S. portion of a letter and read it again after finishing the rest. With a P.S., you can close your letter on a particularly positive and powerful note. To do so, be sure the P.S. contains information valuable to the employer. You might mention how a skill or experience of yours relates to one of the employer’s current goals. You might also congratulate the reader on an achievement or media coverage.
Write to someone in particular.
Avoid sending a letter “To whom it may concern.” If you don’t know the name of the person who will receive your letter, try searching Google or LinkedIn to uncover the name of the appropriate hiring manager or a contact in the human resources department.
“Drop names” to make an impact.
One of the most compelling ways to begin the letter is to mention the name of a person who referred you. If don’t know someone connected to the employer, consider referencing an interview you might have seen or read about that featured quotes from someone employed at the organization.
Refer to your resume, but don’t repeat it word-for-word.
Your letter should expand on the results, skills and success stories that are in your resume. Be sure to add more details about these points or blend two or three accomplishments from your resume into one powerful story in your letter.
These are great. When I'm hiring for a position, I rarely, if ever, consider someone who just sent a resume with no cover. (And you'd be amazed at how many I get.) Cover letters are your opportunity to show recruiters that your interest goes beyond your need for a job. Companies hire based on their needs, not yours.
Job board sites like Monster and Career Builder have great commercials. They're so good I get sort of a left behind feeling because my resume's not "out there." They want you to think that your dream job is just a click away. Is it?
Today, The Wall Street Journal asks the experts to weigh in on whether or not those sites will help you land a job or advance your career. Here's the gist:
- Monster, Career Builder, and Hot Jobs "are nice for very young, entry-level job hunters," but more experienced professionals do better with "industry-specific" sites.
- Experts favor Jobing.com because it provides local listings, and Craigslist.com and Execunet.com because they "cut right to the noise and get to the actual job."
- Most of the sites "have pretty good security" except for Craigslist.
But I think their last question and answer is the most helpful.
Q: What advice do have for job hunters searching employment boards?
A: Don't put too much time into them, advises Mr. Cohen [career counselor and executive coach in New York]. He recommends investing heavily in networking in person and online.
With unemployment at 7.6%, and nonfarm payrolls falling sharply, it's likely you or someone you know has been "affected" (company lingo for "laid off"). But as a recent Times article notes, survivors of layoffs are affected too (even if it seems a bit casual to consider compared to the plight of the riffed).
Here are some ways survivors can be affected:
The terms psychologists toss around to describe these feelings include survivor's guilt (why him and not me?), survivor's envy (thinking you might be better off gone too) and emotional contagion (the tendency to pick up your laid-off colleagues' feelings of gloom and desperation). These feelings are with us in every recession, but as layoffs spread to more industries, people in all walks of life are increasingly experiencing them.
I've experienced a combination of these feelings as coworkers and friends have lost their jobs. There's a lot of "why him and not me?" and "feelings of gloom" for them as they try to pick up the pieces. However, both of these responses can be healthy.
The first gives me a renewed thankfulness for my job. The realization that my job just happens to be (for now) within Focus on the Family's strategic vision for the future is sobering. Meaning, it could just have easily been me that got laid off (not that it's like that with all layoffs).
The second has me empathizing with those that have been laid off. So when I meet them, I ask how they're doing, if I can help, and how I can pray for them. Which, according to Time, is what the "survivors" should do.
People who lose their jobs often feel ostracized, which is partly a function of how the still-employed, going through internal turmoil of their own, treat them. "Most people say nothing, most people are afraid of you," says Damian Birkel, a career counselor and founder of the nonprofit Professionals in Transition, which provides services to the unemployed. "For someone to come in and offer any type of support during what is the most awkward and embarrassing time you're going to have — that is a courageous act."
How have you been affected by the recession?
When I was three years old, Elivs Presley performed a concert in Hawaii that was beamed by satellite to a billion people. I don't remember a lot from the night my parents took us over to some friend's house to watch the concert, but I ended up getting a lot of wear out the LP version of the show. My favorite song was "I Can't Help Falling in Love With You," one that Elvis introduces as a song from the movie "Blue Hawaii." When I tried to watch the movie later, I realized it wasn't as compelling as the concert, but I did find all the Hawaiian shirts to be rather cool.
It wasn't until this past weekend that I discovered the connection between Elvis and casual clothes in the workplace. In an obituary for a man who died at age 86, the Wall Street Journal wrote, "When a lei-draped Elvis Presley posed for the cover of the soundtrack to "Blue Hawaii," he sported a red aloha shirt from the man who made the garment world-famous, Alfred Shaheen." The journal went on to describe the influence of Shaheen's shirts:
Elvis wasn't the only one wearing the wild-style shirts that signified everything from Hawaiian ethnicity to surfer cool to casual Friday. Frank Sinatra wore one in "From Here to Eternity," and Tom Selleck wore one in "Magnum PI." More recently, Hawaiian native President Barack Obama has been photographed in aloha shirts, and so has the Rev. Rick Warren, who gave the inaugural invocation.
And I found this part fascinating:
Lobbied by the Hawaiian Fashion Guild, the state senate in the early 1960s issued a proclamation recommending aloha wear for business attire all summer long, says Ms. Arthur, also a professor of apparel marketing at Washington State University. In 1966, Aloha Friday became official, according to her 2000 book, "Aloha Attire." She contends that Hawaiian shirts were the vessels that carried casual Friday around the country.
"Surfers brought [the shirts] back to the mainland," she says. "These guys then founded Silicon Valley and brought along casual Friday. It was in Hawaii 20 years before it came to the mainland."
Casual Friday has morphed into casual Monday through Thursday in many places and a survey conducted a couple of years ago implies that a majority of today's workers prefer business casual. But that survey also pointed out what employers think is too casual:
The survey uncovered that wearing revealing clothes to the office is the most common fashion faux pas (63 percent), followed closely by wearing flip-flops (62 percent). Fifty percent of executives said employees push the boundaries of office dress codes by wearing jeans. Other inappropriate fashions in the office include sleeveless shirts (44 percent), athletic shoes (42 percent), visible tattoos and piercings (37 percent) and clothing with inappropriate slogans (34 percent).
Whether or not you've ever worn the pioneering Hawaiian shirt, what's been your experience with casual clothes in the workplace?
Are you an entrepreneur or someone who dreams of launching out on an entrepreneurial venture? If so, how are today's economic challenges hitting you? Are they making you more cautious or on the flip side, are they making you more motivated?
If you're looking for some fresh motivation for the risk and hard work of starting something new, consider watching "The Call of the Entrepreneur" on The Fox Business Channel tomorrow, January 10, from 5 p.m. to 6 p.m. EST.
This program was created by our friends at Acton Media and ColdWater Media -- some of the most creative and Biblically engaging media producers we know. In case you miss the show or just want to find out more, you can find a trailer and related information at The Call of the Entrepreneur Website.
Well, it's been ages since I've posted here! Shame on me.
The latest update is that my webzine, TrueU.org is no more. Focus on the Family had to do some major budget cuts, and TrueU was one of the many affected ministries. We published our final articles last week, and there will no longer be any new content.
Honestly, it's been weird. I moved to Colorado Springs nearly four years ago to help start this new webzine. As I wrote in my last article, I've learned so much through my process with TrueU over the years: We started this webzine to help college students better understand and express the Christian worldview. I don't know if any of you have learned anything, but I certainly have. I've had to think through what it means to hold to a consistent belief system, even when it's difficult. I have a better grasp of what it means to listen to others — not just so I can fire back with my opinions, but so that I can truly understand where they're coming from. I've learned that the things I write about need to go beyond ideals — they need to be implemented into my life.
For me, TrueU has been much more than a webzine. It's been part of the path on my journey to being more like Jesus. The things I've learned, the conversations I've had, the articles I've written — they've all been part of me learning and beginning to attempt to implement what the Lord has asked all of us to do.
I really have grown in my understanding of who God is and what He requires of me. I'm so thankful for the time I had at TrueU -- it was a beautiful blessing.
So, right now I'm looking for a new job and trusting that God has a plan. I started a personal blog, and so did TrueU's assistant editor, Matthew John. We're keeping everyone updated with our job searches and such.
Anyway, have any of you been affected by the difficult economic times? If so, what have you found to be of comfort during this time?
I haven't researched the subject, but I'll bet infidelity has been on the rise ever since women flooded the workforce in the 1970's. It's a perfect setting for forming intimate relationships. Where else can you spend such long hours together with members of the opposite sex?
And I'm not just referring to sexual infidelity. Emotional infidelity -- as well as other inappropriate attachments among singles -- can wreak havoc too. CareerBuilder.com calls them "work spouses," which are close platonic relationships with co-workers of opposite sex.
Here are some signs from CareerBuilder.com you should consider when examining your own behavior at work: 1. You depend on a particular co-worker for office supplies, snacks and aspirin.
2. There are inside jokes that you and a specific co-worker share.
3. You can be bluntly honest with this person about his or her appearance, hygiene or hair (and vice versa). You're comfortable enough to point out that the other's hair is sticking up -- or that someone's fly is down.
4. When something eventful happens at work, this co-worker is the first person you seek out for a de-briefing.
5. At breakfast, lunch and coffee breaks, your closest co-worker knows what to order for you and how you like your coffee (and vice versa).
6. You and your co-worker can finish each other's sentences.
7. Someone in your office knows almost as much about your personal life as your best friend or real-life spouse does.
If you're married, you should ensure you're not singling out a member of the opposite sex with these types of intimacy. And if you're single, you should be careful you're not singling out a member of the opposite sex with whom you have no intention of pursuing.
Times are tough. All the leading economic indicators tell the story: Job growth, manufacturing, retail sales, industrial production, and consumer confidence are all down with some at all time lows. And many say these conditions hit young adults the hardest.
The Clarion-Ledger reports, "This economy not only affects people entering the job market for the first time, right out of college," said Bill Brister, assistant professor of finance at Millsaps College in Jackson, "it also affects people who have been in the market a few years.
"Typically, when companies are trying to cut back, the last ones hired get cut first.
"So, opportunities for young people to build careers, to move to better jobs, are limited.
"This hits the 20-somethings hard, the early 30-somethings, too."
Though the economy may affect young adults in greater numbers, they're probably the most able to absorb the loss. I know it's little consolation but you'd be amazed at how little you can live on when you're single and responsible for no one but yourself.
I graduated college during a recession when careers were very hard to launch (particularly for English majors). But I found employment in a restaurant, rented a house with four of my buddies, and ate lots of bologna sandwiches until things turned around.
So buck-up you unemployed 20-something. Things will likely turn around for you too. In the meantime, be grateful for wherever you land ... even if it's mixing Kirschwasser Swiss Cheese in a fondue restaurant.
Finding a job can be nerve-racking. You prepare your resume, dress professionally and prep yourself to say all the right things. But something unconscious might be affecting your job interview more than you think: body language.
According to an article on MSN: Recent studies have shown that employers will form an opinion of you within the first 10 minutes of the interview.
But here's the kicker: It's not always based on what you actually say, but on something we term "body language." For instance, 85 percent of what you communicate is not with words. It's through the tone of your voice, the way you sit and a wealth of other messages that your body involuntarily sends. This is according to Greg Hartley, a body language expert who earned his chops with 20 years as an interrogator in the Army.
The article offers six tips, including "be real from the start," "mind your hands and arms," and "sit up straight." Consider these body language gems: Steepling your fingers makes you appear arrogant, crossing your ankles says you'd rather be somewhere else and touching your ears or nose makes it seem like you're holding something back.
In social settings, I have to fight crossing my arms. I've heard this makes a person seem closed-off or defensive. In my case, I have very long arms and I sometimes don't know what to do with them. What are your body language foibles?
Do you have a hard time imagining your parents as young adults? When you think about your life and the kinds of highs and lows you encounter, is it difficult to imagine a day when your parents when in your shoes?
I remember one day when my grandpa was turning 70 him telling me that he still felt like a 17 year old inside. I'm starting to understand what he meant. Even as I take on more and more adult responsibilities, I still often feel like a kid inside and wonder if the "big people" can see right through my facade of maturity.
But it's amazing that I've gone through much of my life seeing my parents as altogether different. It's like I thought of them as born mature and instant adults -- even though they had to be young once.
This week on The Boundless Show, I tell the story of my dad recording at Sun Studio and then meeting Elvis at the age of 24. Hearing that story growing up I thought of this hyper-mature guy who knew his next chapter was going to be serving as a pastor and being a family man. But, even though he was pretty mature for his age, he was just this young guy trying to live a big life, pursue his dreams and make something of himself.
Yesterday, my dad would have been 61 if he hadn't died in 2003. I still enjoy hearing his old rock music (some of which appears in the podcast today) because it gives me a snapshot of his young adult years. But it also helps to see the full span of his life and to recognize just how pivotal the decisions dad was making in his twenties turned out to be.
Hope you enjoy the show this week.
I was recently reading an advice column in a Christian magazine where a young woman, who was at that point in life that she needed to decide on a career, was having second thoughts about her preferred path. She loved to cook and had dreams of being a world-class chef. For that reason she was studying culinary arts and restaurant management.
Her problem? She was wondering how she could serve God in this career. The advice columnist told the young woman that she could still serve God as a cook. "Who knows? God may use you to treat traveling missionaries when they pass through your church, or He may use your cooking as a way to open the door to sharing your faith with someone in a restaurant who's blown away by what you've prepared."
And while that advice is certainly correct, it's also incomplete. Why must her passion have only a utilitarian value, good only insofar as it helps advance something else? Why can't she pursue cooking simply for the love of cooking?
Both the young woman and the advice columnist are operating under the false premise that we serve God only by being evangelists or, perhaps, by serving those who evangelize. It's the myth of the so-called full-time Christian worker. This myth creates second-class citizens of all those who love the Lord but, apparently, don't serve Him through their workaday lives. I wonder how many people are miserable in their careers as "full-time Christian workers" because they've fallen for the same fiction.
When I first became a Christian 27 years ago, I was eager to serve God, but I faced a similar "dilemma" as this young lady. As far back as I could remember, I'd wanted to be a writer. But I thought the only way I could serve God was as a minister or maybe as a missionary to Africa. (I'd already lived in Africa for several years at that point, so I had no romantic illusions about the continent.) I was genuinely torn between my desire to serve God and my desire to tell stories.
A wise woman at my church showed me the work of Dorothy Sayers, Flannery O'Connor and George MacDonald and told me all were great writers and devout Christians. It was a revelation. She told me that my passion to write stories was put there by God, and while I could use my love of writing to serve God directly through teaching, I could also write stories for the sheer pleasure of it -- and for His pleasure.
Unfortunately, there are some who, despite great talent, believe that the only way to serve God is directly through evangelism. Again, it's not wrong -- just incomplete. In his book Eyes Wide Open, William Romanowski writes of several Christian musicians: The late Keith Green reportedly said, "As for me, I repent of ever having made a record or ever having sung a song unless it's provoked people to follow Jesus, to lay down their whole life before him, to give him everything." Can a song really do that, "provoke people to follow Jesus," or is that the work of the Holy Spirit? Likewise, [Christian musician] Carman explains, "I don't just want to spend my time on social commentary because there's too much of it going on and it doesn't deliver anyone from sin." And the members of a Christian rock group said, "Issues are great, but there's no transforming or cleansing power in them."
These sentiments are admirable, but I believe they're mistaken. Why can't one of these artists write a beautiful love song to his wife or a soothing lullaby for a child? Why can't he write a beautiful song whose primary purpose is to praise God, not to convert unbelievers? Why can't he write an instrumental piece for the sheer sake of writing something beautiful? I believe using your God-given talents in this way is honoring God just as much, if not more, than producing mediocre work with no heart in it. To be sure, you must "always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have" (1 Peter 3:15), but you also serve God by doing whatever you do with passion and to the best of your ability.
One of my favorite movie scenes is from Chariots of Fire, where the sister of Olympic runner Eric Liddell questions why his passion for running seems stronger than his passion to become a missionary. Liddell answered, "I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run I feel His pleasure."
God made me -- and you -- for a purpose. What do you love to do? What gives that little tickle in the belly when you think about it? Sure, it might be as a missionary or preacher. But it might be as a butcher, baker or candlestick maker. No matter what it is, "work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving" (Colossians 3:23-24).
I found this link on Joe Carter's blog which may help with all those considering the "Now What?" question Steve asked yesterday. It's a list of top 10 cities for recent college grads based on "entry-level job openings, rental prices for one-bedroom apartments and large resident populations of young adults in their early 20s."
Here they are with one-bedroom prices on the side:
1. Philadelphia, $962
2. Boston, $1,343
3. New York, $1,520
4. Phoenix, $741
5. Chicago, $1,029
6. Dallas-Fort Worth, $755
7. Los Angeles, $1,435
8. Houston, $778
9. Detroit, $699
10. Atlanta, $773
I think the qualifications they mention (job openings, apartment prices, populations of young adults) are pretty good. But I'm wondering what other qualifications our readers might put on the list. Well?
 I love the way the movie Finding Nemo ends. After planning their escape for so long, the tropical fish that Nemo left behind in the tank have finally pulled of a successful scheme. After jamming the high-tech tank cleaner, the dentist has bagged them individually in order to clean the tank -- leaving them with the opportunity to hop out the window, cross a busy street and plop into Sydney harbor. After a quick cheer of celebration, they sit bobbing up and down still tied up in their bags. A look of concern comes over the face of Bloat, the blowfish, who asks the priceless line "Now what?" And that's the question you're left with as the credits start to roll.
Now that it's June, I assume that the majority of those of you who graduated from college this spring have already had your much anticipated graduation ceremony. You've likely thrown your mortarboard in the air and celebrated with friends and family.
Now what?
"So, Mommy," my daughter sheepishly began. "Did you know that Riley gets paid to do jobs for her mom?"
"Hmm, no, didn't know that," I smiled.
A few minutes later I have agreed that yes, I will think of some jobs my 7-year-old can do for me to earn money. No time like the present to learn a good work ethic and what we do with our money once we earn it (oh yeah, you know me, reinforcement on tithing cannot be far away).
Evidently, though, I'm a little slow off the draw because my daughter hits me up within a few hours. She has thought of some jobs. "Oh, really, honey? Let me hear them."
Idea #1: She will do a play and her dad and I will pay for tickets. Here we have a talk about the things we do for our family simply because they are family. She's disappointed, but not defeated.
Idea #2: She will get up a little early and set the breakfast table for me. Another talk. This one is about how if we are going to get paid to do a job it needs to be one, something that we work hard for, and two, something that mommy really needs help with.
I come up with an idea: she can clean blinds. You can see the wheels spinning in her head. Obviously not what she had in mind. But after a few days of contemplating and also seeing the Barbie at Target that I remind her she can buy when she has her own money, she's ready.
So, this weekend for three hours (no, I'm not kidding), my daughter sat on the living room floor taking the vacuum across the blind slats, one by one. One dollar per window and she didn't stop until she had enough money for her tithe plus the Barbie.
It was a great day for both of us. She learned about the rewards (and not just financial) of hard work and I felt an incredible satisfaction in her dedication and also in the fact that she really did help me. I hate cleaning blinds.
It made me wonder how often I am like my 7-year-old when I'm talking with God. Yes, Father, I want to do some work for you, but I've got my own great ideas. How about I do this? I really enjoy it and that can be my work. Or how about this? It gives me a lot of satisfaction and it's not too hard.
Justin Taylor touched on this in yesterday's article, Working Out a Theology of Work: Whatever your vocation, God calls you to honor Him, to reflect His image, and to labor with all of your might. You may not be in your dream job right now. But the secret is to honor God in the little things and to sanctify the ordinary.
Am I laboring with all of my might? Am I working heartily, as for the Lord and not for men? This weekend, I felt I had a small glimpse of God's perspective. The play would have been fun. Setting the table wouldn't have been too hard. But my daughter worked hard and she did what I really needed her to do. God, make me that kind of daughter to you. Even if it means cleaning blinds.
My most recent article talks about life after college and all of the stresses and decisions that came with it. Basically, during my senior year, I suddenly realized that I would soon have to find an apartment, pay bills and work eight hours a day -- I would have to be an adult! It scared me: People were expecting things of me — lying on the couch and watching daytime soap operas wasn't going to cut it. And so, instead of getting to the task at hand and embracing the idea of becoming a responsible adult, the resentment began to build. Just who did people think they were, expecting me to work and pay for things?! I thought it was all pretty rude.
Unfortunately, people (and by "people" I mean, of course, "my parents") weren't all that sympathetic to my plight, so I rethought my bitterness. I began to think logically about my options, probably like you're doing right now (in between panic attacks).
The options I outline in my article include getting a job, going to graduate school or taking a year off. The work option seemed most logical, but also kind of frightening -- mainly because I had decided I didn't like my major all that much. But it also caused me to realize something: I had bought into our culture's idea that, in order to do something well, I had to be utterly and completely passionate about it. Many of us have come to believe that feeling fulfilled in our careers is of highest importance — worth more than the wages we earn or the family we'll be supporting in the near future.
Graduate school was a good option, but I wasn't quite sure what I wanted an advanced degree in. So, I decided to attend the Focus on the Family Institute, which was probably one of the best choices I've made. I learned a ton and it opened the door for my current job.
So, what options did you consider once you graduated college? Did you make the transition to adulthood with grace, or did you stumble along the way?
I can't think of a more harmful conversation starter among friends than, "I make $_2,000 a year. What do you make?" But maybe that's because I'm over 35.
According to this New York Times article, young professionals are more open about discussing their salaries with friends because a little comparison shopping helps them know if they're making enough where they are or need to start looking for a new job.
Another reason cited in the article is the job-hopping mentality of 20-somethings. Robert H. Frank, an economics professor at Cornell, said that an open flow of information is deemed crucial by young professionals who think of themselves as free agents, not company men.
"People move between jobs a lot more now than they used to," Dr. Frank said. This mobility alone increases the instances that salary might come up among friends.
"If you change jobs, that's news," he said. "If you get a better salary, that's the explanation of the news: 'They’re paying me 80 grand, the last place only paying me 65.'"
Barbara W. Keats, an associate professor of management at Arizona State University who studies money attitudes among the young, said that their relative lack of manners regarding salary can be traced to the self-esteem movement embraced by baby boomer parents.
"As they moved through primary and secondary school, the focus was always to avoid anything that might stifle their creativity or hem them in," she said, which has bled into their sense of etiquette. "They're special, and however they say things is very cute."
Gone are the company men whose identities were very much tied to their line of work. They've been replaced with a generation who've been told "you're special" all their lives. And who already share every other detail of their lives on Facebook and MySpace.
Still, there's no getting around the inherent problems with divulging your salary. Still, there are good reasons that generations of parents have instructed their children to keep quiet about money, social scientists say. In a meritocratic country, money has always been the great divider, the primary way Americans connote status.
Thus it is impossible to engage in a conversation about income that is entirely innocent, said Herb Goldberg, a clinical psychologist in Los Angeles who has written about financial issues.
"When people talk about money," he said, most people traditionally have presumed that there is "a motive behind it, and the motive is what makes it seem impolite." People bombarded with unwelcome salary information, or pressed to disclose it, assume someone is raising the topic to subtly brag, or put someone else down, he said.
I can think of a couple of more problems. The high earners will be expected to be more generous and judged if they do not meet those expectations. And the low earners will be scrutinized every time they go indulge in a latte.
So my advice is to avoid such discussions altogether.
In tenth grade I decided I wanted to be a journalist.
My motivation was less than noble—I wanted to meet Steven Curtis Chapman. Still, I was intent enough on my goal to write to the editor of my favorite magazine to ask her how I could get a job there. That magazine was Brio, and that editor was Susie Shellenberger.
Susie wrote me a personal letter back telling me about her writing experience and suggesting that I join my high school newspaper, study journalism in college and get things published. "You won't have to think about getting a job for a long time," she wrote. "But here are some things to get you started." Even back then, her writing advice was pragmatic in its "just do it" spirit.
Six years later I started my job at Focus on the Family as assistant editor of Clubhouse and Clubhouse Jr. magazines. On the day I shared my story with my department, I read that letter Susie had written years before. What I didn't know was that Susie had her own writing mentor. In her article "Writing Without Inspiration" Susie says: I don't think Mrs. Milton knew what she was starting. She gave our fifth grade class the assignment of reading a book and reporting on it. After I read and reported on my book, I decided it couldn't be that tough to write one, so I created my own "book" and gave a second report. That was it. I was hooked.
Susie was my Mrs. Milton. On that day I brought that letter to work, Susie patted me on the back, smiled and said, "I'm glad I wrote that letter." I doubt Susie knew what she was starting when she typed up that single sheet. I hope her article today inspires you in the same way.
Oh, and I did meet Steven Curtis Chapman -- three times.
I can identify with a point Thomas Jeffries makes in his article featured on Boundless today about the best response to writer's block. He writes: I need to read.
That's right, no fresh air for me. No vigorous exercise. No peaceful meditation. My remedy for writer's block is a healthy dose of quality prose, maybe even some poetry.
I'm going through this right now trying to get a book written before July. At the time I should be writing in every spare moment, I have a stack of books on my bedside table and more on order from the library. But that's what pushes me on and stretches me beyond my own little world.
I also appreciate the point Thomas makes about which book can best stretch writers. He continues: Sometimes it's something I've read before, other times I go back to the old standbys — classic pieces that never fail to inspire. Occasionally I'll go back a couple millennia or more, because — despite the barriers of time and translation — modern writers can still learn plenty from the most inspirational (and best-selling) book of all.
Over the years, I've read writing coaches who find inspiration for their writing from the Bible even if they aren't believers. They praise its simplicity, its strong appeal to the senses, its stories and its poetry. I've been able to appreciate more about this recently as I've been digging into the Literary Study Bible that Crossway produced as a companion to their ESV translation. The insights in this study Bible go beyond entertaining English majors like me, they remind us all of the creativity the Holy Spirit brought to communicating the logos.
For the writers among our readers, how has the Bible inspired your writing?
The other day, my youngest son was playing in my books and handed me my copy of Good to Great. As I skimmed through it again, I wondered if it would be worth a blog post on the chance that at least one Boundless Line reader hadn't read this book (since this business favorite by Jim Collins has remained a bestseller since it came out in 2001).
One of the principles best popularized by Good to Great is the "Hedgehog Concept." It's based on an ancient Greek parable: "the fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing." Good to Great describes how a man named Isaiah Berlin used this parable to divide people into either foxes or hedgehogs: Foxes pursue many ends at the same time and see the world in all its complexity. They are "scattered or diffused, moving on many levels," says Berlin, never integrating their thinking into one overall concept or unifying vision. Hedgehogs, on the other hand, simplify a complex world into a single organizing idea, a basic principle or concept that unifies and guides everything. It doesn't matter how complex the world, a hedgehog reduces all challenges and dilemmas to simple -- indeed almost simplistic -- hedgehog ideas. For a hedgehog, anything that does not somehow relate to the hedgehog idea holds no relevance (Good to Great, p. 91).
Recognizing that commitment to a simple hedgehog idea was a primary springboard for companies to go from good to great, Collins and his team developed three circles people can use to identify their own hedgehog concept (you can find a graph here with more detail). To help readers apply the idea, Collins offers this personal analogy: Suppose you were able to construct a work life that meets the following three tests. First, you are doing work for which you have a genetic or God-given talent, and perhaps you could become one of the best in the world in applying that talent ("I feel that I was just born to be doing this.") Second, you are well paid for what you do. ("I get paid to do this? Am I dreaming?") Third, you are doing work you are passionate about and absolutely love to do, enjoying the actual process for its own sake. ("I look forward to getting up and throwing myself into my daily work, and I really believe in what I'm doing." If you could drive toward the intersection of these three circles and translate that intersection into a simple, crystalline concept that guided your life choices, then you'd have a Hedgehog Concept for yourself (Good to Great, p. 96).
How would you apply this concept in your life? Have you tried it? Among those who have tried it, did you see any parallels to Biblical principles for life?
My company's health and wellness department is about to start the spring fitness challenge "Walk it Off!" For $5, employees can participate in the challenge from May to July and qualify to win major prizes. I've participated in past challenges and have always appreciated my company's interest in my health.
The Newsweek article "Dieting for Dollars" examines the trend among companies to monitor employee health habits and reward those who shape up. In an effort to rein in mounting health-care costs (employer health insurance premiums increased an average of 6.1 percent last year, more than twice the rate of inflation), hundreds of employers are using financial rewards and, increasingly, penalties, too, to persuade employees to take demonstrable steps to improve their health and reduce their health insurance costs, and absenteeism in the bargain.
Companies have good reasons for doing this. Not only can such "persuasion" reduce health-care costs. Increased health among employees is proven to increase productivity. The economic impact goes beyond health-care costs. A survey of nearly 29,000 workers, published in the Journal of Occupational and Environmental Medicine in 2003, found that health-related lost productivity time-from missed days, reduced work hours, and so-called presenteeism (going to work sick and being markedly less productive)-costs employers nearly $226 billion a year, or about $1,685 per employee. Improve employees' behavior, the thinking goes, and you can improve their health and productivity and lower the costs of health care.
I had never heard the term "presenteeism," but I've certainly witnessed a lot of it this winter. (Think: the person hacking in the cubicle next door.) Who knew you put such a big price tag on employees going to work sick. Many companies are encouraging employee health by offering monetary rewards to workers who complete health assessments, quit smoking and lose weight. But this kind of "encouragement" may have its limits. If financial rewards aren't enough to convince employees to change their behavior, employers could find themselves in an awkward position. Can they require participation in health improvement programs? Should employees be punished if they join a program but don't achieve optimal results? Can employees who refuse to stop smoking or to lose weight be fired? "It's a really slippery slope," says Peter Cappelli, director of the Center for Human Resources at the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School of Business. "There are big legal and ethical issues with pushing employees to change their behavior."
However, the results of health incentive programs are good. Some studies published in the American Journal of Health Promotion found that work site health promotions could reduce medical and absenteeism costs by 25 to 30 percent over the course of three to four years. And who doesn't appreciate the nudge to be a healthier person -- even if it's coming from work? I like to walk anyway. Prizes are just icing on the (rice) cake.
If you're as great as your resume says you are, you probably don't need one. At least that's what marketing expert Seth Godin says. Instead, just show potential employers a project you completed or your personal blog. Oh, and it helps if you can get recommended by someone your prospective boss knows and respects.
Come to think of it, if you can score the latter, you may not need the former.
I found this job-getting advice on the popular "how to" blog, Lifehacker.com. But if you lack such convenient recommendations or project experience, the post continues with some good resume tips from career adviser Penelope Trunk: Don't focus on your responsibilities, focus on what you achieved. [...] Most people do not think in terms of quantified achievements when they are in the job, but on the resume, that's the only part of the job that matters. No one can see that you were a "good team player" on your resume unless you can say "established a team to solve problem x and increased sales x%" or "joined under-performing team and helped that team beat production delivery dates by three weeks."
That's good advice. And it's applicable for recent grads and new job seekers too. You just need to develop the art of educing your accomplishments from whatever work experience you've had.
Here's one example:
Say you worked for a mortgage lender making cold calls to generate clients. You could say something like, "Sold loan programs to existing clients and other pre-selected leads." But it'd be much better to say, "Sold more loan programs than 80% of staff of 15 loan officers within three months of employment."
Or to follow Godin's advice, you could just blog about it and then send your prospective employer the loan files. =)
Apparently today is the 40th birthday of the cubicle. Umm ... woo hoo? 
For those of you who work in an office, you are probably familiar with the glory of the square, gray walls that surround you and your computer. But if you live in a sea of dull cubicles, no worries. Someone with way a lot of imagination has come up with the ultimate cubicle experience.
Scott Adams, creator of the Dilbert cartoons, has created a fancy cubicle complete with a hammock, "boss monitor" and a flower that wilts when you leave. Basically, you'll be so busy exploring your new work space that you would never get any work done.
I appreciate Adams' creativity, though. Cubicles are dull, and we spend a lot of time in them each week. That's why I've tried to jazz mine up a bit. I've got fabric on the walls, lamps to help me avoid the harsh lighting and pictures of friends and family. I'm also one of the few that has an actual window -- it's a blessing and also let's me know what the crazy Colorado weather is up to.
Have you done anything to spice up your work space, or is it still pretty bland?
I was in the Denver airport this weekend, returning from a personal trip to the East Coast. While waiting for my short connecting flight to Colorado Springs, I witnessed a certain type you've probably seen yourself: Mr. Self-Important Businessman, talking too loud on his cell phone, his appointment calendar/portfolio open on the seat next to him as he worked on his laptop.
Even as we were boarding he had his laptop open in his cradled arm, click-clacking away with one hand as he walked down the jetway. After the flight attendant told us to turn off all electronic devices, he merely closed his laptop and stashed it under the seat. (I know it was still on because I was in the row behind him and could see its power light still glowing.) The moment we reached altitude, Mr. Self-Important had the laptop out, typing away. Now you have to understand that the flight from Denver to Colorado Springs lasts barely 15 minutes and never really reaches a cruising altitude; it's basically climb and then descend. They have no beverage service on this flight, it's so short, so I wonder why they even bother to tell passengers they can turn on electronic devices.
Meanwhile, sitting diagonally across from me in the aisle seat was a United Airlines flight attendant, in uniform but obviously not on duty for this flight. As we were descending into the Colorado Springs airport, the flight attendant up front announced that it was time to turn off all electronic devices -- less than five minutes after she said they could be used. At that point we were about three minutes from touchdown.
About 10 seconds elapsed, and Mr. Self-Important showed no signs of turning off the laptop. The off-duty flight attendant leaned forward and, in a professional voice, said, "Sir, you need to turn off the laptop." Whereupon he exploded. Red in the face, he yelled across the aisle that he was going to if she'd just give him a chance. "You people are so rude!" he yelled at her. "Give me a [expletive] chance! I can't believe how rude you people are!"
This 40-something man didn't just yell at her; he physically leaned in on her. The young woman, maybe all of 25 years old, was taken aback. I was appalled, and I nearly came out of my seat because I thought he was going to physically attack her. He continued to mumble under his breath, still red in the face. (He still didn't turn it off, either, but did his previous trick of merely closing the lid.) The young lady stared ahead with the look of someone who'd just been deeply frightened and humiliated.
He had the nerve to call her rude. Rude! "Hello, Mr. Pot? Kettle calling." I should have said something. Instead, I just seethed. But we were already on the ground, and discretion was probably the better part of valor at that point.
We pulled up to the gate, and Mr. Self-Important was one of the first into the aisle to get off the plane. I was behind him, still seething. I could not believe the disrespect and unbridled anger this supposedly respectable businessman showed in public. I wonder what he’s like at home.
I'm still angry at myself for not speaking up. (No one else did, either.) But I did make a point of stopping momentarily by the young woman. I patted her shoulder: "Thank you for doing your job," I said. It's all I could think to say.
I never caught Mr. Self-Important's name, but his business cards had a Verizon logo on them. (There's a large Verizon operation in Colorado Springs.) I hope he reads this. More important, I hope his bosses do too.
While working on Capitol Hill, I decided I needed an advanced degree to further my career. So I took the LSAT and was accepted into Regent University's School of Government graduate program. And just before I was to begin classes, my new wife (five months) got pregnant.
Now I know many would not have paused at this news. But I did. Because I knew graduate work meant limited availability at home and even more college debt. So I had a decision to make. Would my time away from home and money be worth it? Would I see the return in my career I was hoping for?
I chose ... not to go. Instead, we worked out a plan to pay off all of our debt before the baby's birth and trusted God with my future earning potential so that my wife could stay home. And it's worked so far. We've lived on one income for 10 years and two kids debt free (except our mortgage).
Now I would never be so presumptuous to say that everyone should take that path. Many pursue advanced degrees and are rewarded with position, financial security, and job satisfaction. Only God knows what would have happened if I had chosen to brave $20,000 in graduate work.
But I've found that sometimes not choosing more education is a risk worth taking. Even for English majors.
What does Scripture say about workplace leadership? How can managers and supervisors bring their Sunday faith with them to work on Monday?
Bruce E. Winston, Ph.D., dean for the School of Global Leadership & Entrepreneurship at Regent University, has wrestled for years with these questions and has found a perhaps-unlikely answer in Jesus' Sermon on the Mount. Specifically, the Beatitudes.
Interestingly, he found that the most common workplace problems were solved by applying the first Beatitude. The second most common issues were resolved by applying the second Beatitude. And so on down the list.
Dr. Winston has written a series, applying these biblical principles to leadership, for Boundless. We published the introduction back in December 2007. Since then, we've seen the roles of humility, empathy, and discipline in workplace leadership.
I'm personally challenged by this series, and am trying to put these principles into practice where I work. I'm eager to see what might happen should others in positions of leadership adopt these principles.
Have you ever dated a co-worker? If so, did you have to sign a "love contract"?
Earlier this month, The Christian Science Monitor reported on employers asking dating employees to sign "consensual relationship agreements."
 David Ritter, a partner in employment law at Neal, Gerber & Eisenberg in Chicago explains in the article what the agreements do:
It's an acknowledgment by two people that they're in a consensual relationship, have not been forced to be in this relationship, and understand the company's policy on sexual harassment. If either one of the people in the relationship ever claims sexual harassment as a result of this, this is pretty powerful evidence.
Agreements like this are being considered by more HR departments because of the explosion of workplace dating -- according to this article "more than 40 percent of workers say they have dated a co-worker."
Challenges mentioned in the article for workplace romance included subordinates dating superiors, couples showing affection in the office or through workplace equipment and also the "teenager" aspects of workplace breakups.
While these challenges can motivate employers to require "love contracts," how do couples feel about signing such agreements? How would you feel about someone saying, "I've sure enjoyed all the time we've spent together over sushi and spreadsheets -- would you be interested in signing a consensual relationship agreement?"
Do you ever feel you have little to show for the work you do -- and therefore have a limited sense of accomplishment at the end of the day?
 That's a topic Jared Sandberg addresses in his Cubicle Culture feature in the Wall Street Journal this week. His observation is that when work is invisible, so are its satisfactions.
In the information age, so much is worked on in a day at the office but so little gets done. In the past, people could see the fruits of their labor immediately: a chair made or a ball bearing produced. But it can be hard to find gratification from work that is largely invisible, or from delivering goods that are often metaphorical.
I see a dramatic difference between the more physical labor I did as my primary job into my mid-twenties and the more digital work I do now. Projects like cleaning the basement or even mowing the yard continue to give a more immediate sense of payoff than today's digital office.
I remember a co-worker telling me a few years ago about his motivation to finish his basement. "I realized recently that all the work I did over the past five years could fit onto a floppy disc," he said, "I need to do something with my hands that creates more tangible results."
One person the Wall Street Journal interviewed described his jealousy of how Fred Flintstone felt at the end of his day at the quarry. "He seems so happy sliding down that dinosaur's tail when the whistle-bird blows," he says.
Do you find satisfaction in your work? If not, do you have any side projects or hobbies that give you a sense of a job well done?
When I went to college, choosing a major wasn't too difficult for me. I've known what I wanted to do ever since I plagiarized a book I'd read in order to write my first story. (The book was called Ginny Gordon and the Mystery of the Missing Candlesticks. My "original" short story was called "Daisy Sundown and the Mystery of the Missing Tiles.")
When I was 12, I had a story I wrote (all mine this time) published in American Girl magazine. In the little author interview, I said that I wanted to be a writer someday because I wanted to paint pictures with words.
Painting pictures with words has always been my goal. But even on the way to being a writer, I've had to think through career decisions -- even though I've known what I want to do, I've had to be discerning and wise about my choices.
For example, in college I chose to major in journalism instead of English. I would rather have studied English because it would've allowed for a creative writing emphasis. I would have been able to do the kind of writing I wanted to do. However I majored in journalism because I got more variety. A journalism degree would teach me how to write articles -- and I could expand my style after I knew the basics.
A journalism degree also probably allowed for more variety in job choices. I could edit, I could write, I could work for a newspaper or a magazine. Although I would've enjoyed the English degree, I thought it would limit my job opportunities to teaching. (Of course, that may not be true for everyone, but it was part of my thought process as I chose what to do with my college career.)
After college, I knew that I didn't want to write for a newspaper -- it didn't allow me to be as creative as I wanted to be. But I still applied for newspaper jobs. I was qualified for them, and they would help me pay bills. I didn't end up working for a newspaper -- the Lord blessed me with my job at TrueU, but it is good to know that I have the skills for a variety of writing jobs if and when I need to move on to something else.
The point, I guess, is that I believe it's important to think through options when looking at college classes or job opportunities. Sometimes you may choose something you're not as "passionate" about because it's a more practical choice. Reality hits in the form of rent and car payments and it's good to have made career choices that will help pay those bills.
If possible, find something you enjoy doing, but if you need to tweak it a bit for a time, that's OK. Life is long -- we have lots of seasons -- and most of us will do lots of different things over time. If you find yourself in a job you don't love at the moment, take it for what it's worth. Learn what you can, and eventually you can move on.
So, let's discuss. Do you enjoy your job? Are you happy with your career choices? What can you do to get where you want to be?
My favorite new book is To Infinity and Beyond! The Story of Pixar Animation Studios. It's been out for a couple of months now, but I waited to get it at the library since purchasing it at the list price of $75 would have required a financing plan. That price is due to its 300 plus page heft and its coffee table dimensions of 12.3 x 9.1 x 1.3 inches. As I dig into it, however, it's starting to trump U2ByU2 as the better coffee table book (despite its shocking chartreuse cover).
While at first I thought I'd be jazzed about all the details behind Pixar's breakthrough movies like The Incredibles and Cars, what I've enjoyed more are the stories about the early days before there was a Pixar.
Like the story of a young John Lasseter (director of Toy Story, Toy Story 2 and A Bug's Life) and his siblings getting pads of paper from their mother to keep them quiet during church. "We'd sit down, and she'd immediately hand us the paper," says Lasseter. "I sat there and drew the whole time. I even did flip books in the corners of the songbooks."
Or the story of how Pixar grew out of Lucasfilm which grew out of George Lucas's innovations for the Star Wars franchise. Or the story of how Lucasfilm was disappointed that they couldn't sell their "Computer Division" to General Motors for computer-assisted automative design and had to settle for an offer by Steve Jobs.
These and other stories provide a great glimpse of the years and years of painstaking cultivation by engineers, illustrators, businessmen and storytellers that had to come together in order to make Pixar an "overnight success." Pixar's path is a reminder that no breakthroughs are inevitable, but require stubborn vision.
Historical reviews of companies like Pixar are helpful for anyone with a big dream who needs perspective for the headaches, set backs and impatience that they are drowning in right now.
Are there any errors in the following paragraph? In order to insure the magazine's success, Candace Watters asked an author from Bogota, Columbia to write on the issue of Latin American dating practices. That particular issue of the magazine was comprised of articles that explored dating from a variety of cultural perspectives. Once it was published, the author received many complements.
If so, tell me what they are.
USAToday.com reports on a survey of 301 business leaders about the preparedness of college graduates entering the work force. And it seems they're giving them a failing grade. Aptitude is important, they say, but what they really want is for colleges to help students apply what they've learned in real-world settings. Forget transcripts, multiple-choice tests or institutional scores. The surveyed business leaders want faculty assessment of internships, senior projects or community-based work.
"Too many policymakers and educational leaders are focused on the tests rather than on what is really important: whether students are learning what they need to know," says Roberts Jones, president of Education & Workforce Policy, a consulting firm based in Alexandria, Va.
The "what they need to know" is never really spelled out in the article. They just know they're not getting it. But I think it has something to do with working well with others and demonstrating an ability to get the job done. As USAToday notes, Carol Geary Schneider, President of the Association of American Colleges and Universities, said that colleges and universities must look for new ways to demonstrate student success.
Last year, I blogged about the importance of on-the-job mentors for graduates entering the work force and offered some tips based on my personal experience. But I'd be interested in hearing from our readers who've completed internships or just entered the job force on what they learned from their "real world experience."
Some companies are known for having a family-like atmosphere, but have you ever worked for a company that was predominately built around a family?
Last month, the L.A. Times ran a profile on the photo-sharing company SmugMug that was launched as a family affair.
Seven members of the MacAskills (ranging in age from 23 to 63) make up what is now 28 employees of SmugMug. The article describes how they've made it work: They started on a shoestring budget in 2002, not moving into real offices in Mountain View, Calif., until April. Before that, the MacAskills and their employees set up shop in the five-bedroom home of Chris and his wife, Toni. Engineers bunked two to a bedroom. Blow dryers and vacuums routinely blew circuit breakers. Barking yellow Labrador retrievers chased tennis balls up and down the stairs.
Toni, the SmugMug matriarch, referees family squabbles. When things get out of hand she sometimes jokes that she'll send everyone to their rooms for a time out.
The MacAskills deftly blend business and family -- a radical concept in the youth-obsessed Internet industry, which admits adults, particularly of the gray-haired variety, only reluctantly.
I enjoyed reading this article because I often dream about the opportunity to run a home-based business with my wife (and hopefully even my kids) some day.
What's been fascinating to me is how technology is beginning to make it possible for families to once again run the kind of home and family-based businesses that were the norm before the industrial revolution split family members up for work in various factories.
I'm hopeful technology and emerging business models will create more and more opportunities for families to find ways to pool their skills together and to have the option of blending their work and family life. Already, this trend is giving moms of young children more alternatives to simply going back to conventional offices and giving road warrior dads more options for re-integrating into their families.
No telling what the options will look like for entrepreneurial couples and families who want to work together in the coming years.
When I was 21, nothing sounded better than a mega-watt career with the potential to "change the world." Especially since I didn't have a boyfriend, or even a potential boyfriend. Things were utterly fruitless in the romance category. Thankfully I did get a job -– entry level -– and set to work to turn it into a career. To me it was exciting, glamorous, dream-fulfilling. And I was willing to work long hours to make it happen.
I didn't find out till later that hard work is, well, hard. It's a lot more fun to be COO of your home and family with a bit of external work thrown in. It's a lot more creative, too. That's been my experience, anyway. That's why I so often encourage women not to put so much emphasis on their education and career goals that they forget about their family ones. Just because you don't have any prospects right now doesn't mean you shouldn't be prepared.
A few weeks ago, I read an article in the Wall Street Journal that confirmed my hunch about career pursuits that displace or preclude marriage and babies. In "The Next Sexual Revolution," Ronald W. Dworkin writes about the trend in our country to delay childbearing for the sake of career and thanks to ever amazing breakthroughs for extending fertility. Case-in-point, "vitrification," or egg storage. Though it's still in development, Dworkin writes, Success is inevitable, and when it arrives, the sociological consequences will be enormous. Right now, one in five children world-wide is born to women over 35. When mass egg storage becomes feasible, that number will likely increase dramatically, and include not just women in their late 30s and 40s, but also women in their 50s, even 60s.
One result, he says, is that even more women will delay childbearing and with more hope that they’ll still be able to have babies later in life. Freezing unfertilized eggs gives women a way out of a complicated cultural maze. … Our culture encourages women to pursue high-powered careers. … The culture paints a rosy image about career and family. Then biological truth breaks through, by which time these women have lost a decade of their best childbearing years.
The prospect of egg storage promises to change all that. Dworkin writes, "Women who opt to freeze their unfertilized eggs will gain those years back –- and more -– giving them the freedom to leisurely follow the male career trajectory."
It's at this point in the article that he reveals a well-kept secret: … most middle-aged people know that many careers can be pretty dull, without much chance to create. Following rules and procedures until midnight in a law firm may seem acceptable when you're 25, but not when you're 50.
He goes on to say that this is why many 50-year-old women will, given the technological ability, decide to start families after all.
What bothers me is that he, and seemingly our whole culture, is OK with that; accepting the "career first, babies later" time-line as just the way things are, rather than encouraging young women to consider the benefits of flipping that order.
Why not tell women who are just exiting college that some things, in this case family, really is as important, if not more so, than career. And in many cases, it's more exciting and rewarding, too. Not only that, but when you have babies first, then build careers later, it's a lot easier on your body, your pocketbook and your future. (Ever seen a 60-year-old first-time mother trying to tumble in a mommy-and-me gym class?)
Don't let the new-fangled medical "solutions" fool you. Women should give as much attention and intentionality to their plans for marriage and children as they do their education and careers.
 Did you catch our featured article yesterday: "Hold Up on the Start Up"?
This is an article for anyone who's ever felt entrepreneurial impulses -- especially those who feel those impulses strong enough to consider quitting their day job.
The author, Glenn Packiam, has pulled off some impressive start-ups in his day as a musician, a worship leader/trainer and as a published author. But he didn't take the path he anticipated to get there. His observations on that path and the Biblical principles he came to value along the way are instructive for anyone who struggles between the overwhelming passion to go act on what they feel God has called them to do and the voice of reason that says (in an almost motherly tone) "Are you crazy? You'd quit your day job for that?"
As a side note, Glenn and I are both mutual admirers of Chip and Dan Heath -- authors of the book Made to Stick. I can't think of many people who wouldn't benefit from absorbing the observations the Heath brothers have made about "why some ideas survive and others die" ... especially the entrepreneurs among us.
It can be frustrating to be a single woman hoping for marriage with no prospects in sight. In many cities and towns, it really does seem like all the good men are married. Statistics notwithstanding, it can be hard to believe that there are in fact, "Plenty of Men to Go Around."
But the evidence continues to suggest that it's not just a problem with passive men who are more interested in their Xbox than in finding a wife. (Yes, that is a problem that warrants attention, but it's not the only problem.)
In a story on cnn.com, Jocelyn Voo reports that "Young Women Are Choosing Career over Love." She writes, When it comes to work versus romance, the stereotype has been that men put a premium on career goals while women focus more on family and friends. Not so, according to a study published recently in the scientific journal "Gender Issues."
Men were more willing than women to sacrifice achievement for a romantic relationship, according to the study conducted by Catherine Mosher of Duke University Medical Center and Sharon Danoff-Burg at the University of Albany.
Researchers asked 237 undergraduates to rate the importance of goals such as financial success, career, education and contribution to society, as well as goals such as romantic relationships, marriage, children and friendship.
And the surprising result, While 51 percent of the women prioritized romantic relationships over achievement goals, more than 61 percent of men did the same.
Why the shift? The article suggests career-oriented women perceive their 20s as prime time to start career-building and are willing to delay marriage and children in order to get a professional leg up. Another culprit is the growing assumption among men that their future wives will work and bring in a second income, thereby lessening the pressure they feel to be sole provider.
Whatever the reasons, it's clear that how women relate to their jobs has has a profound impact on how families form. Or perhaps, don't.
Copyright 2009 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. International copyright secured. The Line and Boundless Line are trademarks of Focus on the Family.
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