The Art of Manliness: Episode 96

Do-It-Yourselfers -- 0:00
Last weekend I spent about an hour pulling my toilet up and fishing out my son's toothbrush from the trapway. (He didn't get in too much trouble. He was just trying to multi-task while getting ready for bed.) I never really considered calling a plumber. I knew I could get 'er done with a couple of tools, a wire coat hanger, and an adventurous spirit. It's a skill I picked up from the ultimate do-it-yourselfer: my dad.

This week, Steve and I talk with Lisa about what our dads taught us and how it's made us better men.

Art of Manliness -- 16:09
I've noticed several ladies comment on the blog this week that they've broken up with men because of poor hygiene. If only those poor guys had known about the Art of Manliness, a website dedicated to, well, the art of being a man. And apparently, good hygiene is part of the art of manliness.

Here's a portion from their article, "Keeping It Fresh: Avoiding Bad Breath, Body Odor, and Cheap Cologne":

Unfortunately, I know far too many grown men who still smell like reeking teens, and whether they know it or not, their odor problem is wreaking havoc on their personal relationships, their business prospects, and the respect people give them. Most of us are too polite to confront a man with an odor problem and some men live completely oblivious to the foul destruction they leave in their wake. We grow accustomed to our own scents and as putrid as they are, we cannot recognize them.Our nose filters out and ignores many background odors, such as the ones in our nasal passages.Some of us also have poor olfactory senses, so bad odors don’t bother us like they do others. Time to wake up and smell the B.O.!

Good stuff.

For this week's Culture segment, Lisa interviews the couple behind the popular Art of Manliness website, Brett and Kate McKay.

Leading a Man to Lead -- 37:34
I thought this was a perfect question to tackle this week. A girl writes that she's in a relationship with a guy who did a great job at initiating a relationship but doesn't really know where to go from there. Should she back off and let him find his way or take the lead on leading him to lead? Or something like that. Anyway, Candice and Lisa have the solution.

Comments

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1. Cat said the following at 3:36 PM on Nov 19:

I tease my boyfriend about guy smell versus man smell. When I give him a hug and he smells like cologne I'll tell him he smells like a man. When he finishes playing paintball...well...he smells like a guy. Guy smell is to be avoided unless A) You just finished playing a strenuous sport B) You just finished lifting weights or C) You just got back from killing things.

Moreover I remember talking to my brother when he moved into his attic apartment with a few of his friends. "The first thing we did was clean the bathrooms," he related, "You know, so we can get the girls to come over."

Now there's a guy who grew up with a sister.

2. William said the following at 6:22 PM on Nov 19:

I'm glad to see you guys talk with the Art of Manliness, I've been following them for a while, and love their site. And the topic is good too, body odor is one of those really-hard-to-get-past things when it's noticeable in a bad way.

3. anna said the following at 7:12 PM on Nov 19:

I tease my brother about the nose hair. It's one of the few manscaping duties a guy has, so if it's like a second mustache, then it's time to pull out the scissors, LOL.

That, and dirty nails. I've been friends with mechanics, and when they are out dating, their hands are clean. So when a guy with a not-handy job has dirty nails, it's very distracting.

4. Janice said the following at 7:12 PM on Nov 19:

GREAT SHOW!!!! I am a red-blooded woman and appreciate shows that give me the 4-1-1 on my life but I LOVE THE MANLY SHOWS! It is so great to have practical, specific stuff for the men! Sometimes, especially the last few months, I had a hard time wanting to share the show with guy friends or my brothers but will definitely share this one with them!

5. Emily Y said the following at 6:33 AM on Nov 20:

An awesome Podcast! But just wondering who was the feature artist for this one? He was rly good..

6. Leigh said the following at 6:35 AM on Nov 20:

Ha ha ha ha ha! Great way to multi-task!

7. Scott said the following at 8:51 AM on Nov 20:

I dig the inbox answer. The guy probably is well-meaning, but some of us weren't so lucky to have learned the "dating skills" that many teens learn, so they often times don't know what a dating relationship looks like and how to get there. I like how you encouraged the woman to point the guy to leadership who will teach him that way. A+, since I am clueless as well, but I have a mentoring relationship and good friends I will learn on if a girl accepts my intentions at some point in my life. ;p

8. Rachel V said the following at 8:55 AM on Nov 20:

About Cheap Cologne: There have been a couple time where I have literally CHOKED on the terrible choice & excessive amount of cologne that men have worn. Easy does it guys!

I'm all for printing off Boundless articles & giving them to people. I started passing them out at my church to the leaders & other influential people.

9. RLynn said the following at 9:01 AM on Nov 20:

I've always said that a man doesn't necessarily need to be "cute", but rather have good hygiene and be well groomed--that often makes a man attractive.

10. Vincenzo said the following at 9:32 AM on Nov 20:

During a talk show, actor Frank Vincent (from Goodfellas) made a funny yet true observation about the audience. He told the host, "Look at the pretty girls, dressed up and beautiful...and the guys look they sleep in hampers..dress up a little guys! You wanna look nice and smell good...guys today don't smell too good." It was the funniest thing I heard on a talk show, but sadly true.

11. Loris said the following at 12:33 PM on Nov 20:

Love, love, LOVE AoM. So many diverse topics!

12. Ted Slater said the following at 1:31 PM on Nov 20:

Emily Y (#5) the music is provided by The Museum. I love their music, too! :-)

13. BDB said the following at 10:30 PM on Nov 21:

This was an excellent podcast. Perhaps the best.

As for the inbox segment:

1)We can stipulate that he has already taken the initiative and expressed interest.

2) Hitch is definitely worth watching. It's secular though.

3) For Christians, a good book on approaching marrige is Elisabeth Elliot's Quest for Love. It will be a good resource for those who wish to approach marriage in a way consistent with scripture. Similarly valuable are the 20+ real-life stories of people who got married, many of whom neve had to "date" to get there. There are other ways.

14. Katie said the following at 2:59 PM on Nov 23:

Loved this show. I like shows for the men. I sometimes think they have a high expectation bar set for them, but nothing to help them achieve it.

I also think that the world (and church) is increasingly feminized, and anything masculine to off set that is a good thing.

15. Jennw2ns said the following at 11:06 AM on Dec 1:

This was a great show . . . and I thought about it while celebrating Thanksgiving at my friend's where she allowed, yea, well-nigh encouraged, her husband and his buddy to behave like Neanderthals. It was very weird. (The food was awesome, though.)

Also, I have to say that hearing about the Art of Manliness website was very encouraging; I once went to a writer's conference and all the magazines represented were for "families" or "women" or "parents." Maybe one or two were for singles in general. Not one was specifically targeting men. It was infuriating, and I wasn't sure what to do about it, being a single WOMAN myself. Three cheers!