Cindy and Me
by Ashley Ramsey on 07/01/2009 at 4:56 PM
I was appalled by the behavior of the female Bible Study leader Cindy in today's article. One of the "newcomers" came to Bible study just as she was, cigarette and all. She nor her smoke received a very warm welcome from Cindy.
"I can't stand cigarette smoke," said Cindy. "It's like I can feel cancer developing in my lungs —"
How snobby. How self-centered. How very much like me. I actually said something similar to this a couple weeks ago standing outside a Ruby Tuesdays. I was with a group of girlfriends and as we were talking I kept smelling smoke. "Why does it smell like smoke out here?" I asked with obvious disdain.
It was sort of a rhetorical question so it didn't bother me when none of my girlfriends answered. A few minutes later a friend on my left switched standing positions which gave me a clear view of a lady with a cigarette not 5 yards from us. My stomach sank. I knew she'd heard me.
When she went back into the restaurant I apologized to my friends for my comment. Well, I don't know if I actually apologized but I said something to the effect of, "Man, I feel like a jerk." One of my more honest friends said, "You are a jerk when you speak without thinking."
Ouch. That stuck with me for at least a week afterward. The kind of sticking with you that makes you cringe with every remembrance.
I really do have a problem with public smoking. A dear friend of mine has Cystic Fibrosis. Secondhand smoke isn't just a nuisance for her; it's a health risk. So I'm not minimizing the danger associated with secondhand smoke. But those risks don't justify blatant rudeness.
Cindy and I have a lot in common. We're both more worried about our preferences than the people God is putting around us. In my experience, when God puts people around me it's not because other parts of the planet were too crowded. It's because he wants to use them to teach me something or use me to extend His love to them. As a believer I want to lay down the things I think I'm entitled to (like fresh air) so that my personal preferences don't hide the light of Christ in me.
1. Margaret said the following at 6:43 PM on Jul 1:
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I can definitely identify with you here and that article. I often find me distancing myself from people I feel uncomfortable around, not thinking of the fact that God calls us to reach out to those exact people. We can see that Jesus spent much of His time with the lowest people of society, He reached out to the lost and hurting, and this is what we must likewise do. Also, thank you very much for your honesty in sharing your experience.
2. Kelly said the following at 6:44 PM on Jul 1:
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Your story reminds me of when I had a friend visiting.
My neighbour smokes in his backyard, and the smell wafted over to my deck. My friend made a very loud comment about how disgusting smoking was - and OF COURSE my neighbour would have been able to hear it.
I said, "Shhhh, he can do what he likes in his own backyard!" but I still felt awful.
I wish I'd gone to his house to apologise later. :(
3. Will said the following at 9:08 PM on Jul 1:
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Smokers should be confined to smoking in their own homes - it is rude in my opinion to smoke any where else.
4. James said the following at 9:27 PM on Jul 1:
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I'm hoping there was some embellishment in that story...lol. I, like I'm sure a lot of people have my believing and non-believing groups of friends... as well as believers who don't exactly fit "the mold" as well. I just try and be the same person regardless of who I'm with. I admit I have a hard time not feeling prideful around certain people though... it's terrible and I need to stop it. We are separate and different yes, but no better. I will have to say I don't consider smoking sinful, it's a trivial matter imo and this is coming from someone who's had two relatives die early from it. It's not healthy and not wise, but so are bottomless fries at Red Robin.
5. Jo said the following at 12:11 AM on Jul 2:
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"A dear friend of mine has Cystic Fibrosis."
Hey, me too. :)
I'm ecstatic about the fact that smoking is now illegal in virtually all public places in the UK. But it does mean there are even more smokers outside those public places, haha.
The article was a good reminder, thanks. We can't be afraid to associate with the drug addicts and the prostitutes and the 'scary' people. And the annoying ones, and the not-so-clever ones, and...
'Tis sometimes hard to see everyone through Jesus' eyes, but that's what we're called to try and do.
6. khalil said the following at 12:33 AM on Jul 2:
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I am not arguing against thinking before speaking and trying to be considerate of others, personally I am one of those that eat a lot of crow and has to pull my foot out of my mouth more often than I would like to so I understand the struggle about opinions and speaking them aloud at times.
While I try not to make an excuse here I think that people who smoke in public or do things that are a public nuisance or danger should be called out. Perhaps there was a kinder way of doing it but maybe the lady smoking outside *needed* to hear that disgust in your voice for smoke. As shame/guilt convicted you about the comment perhaps she felt somewhat convicted about her method of killing herself.
Just some thoughts. I know as we should be in the world and not of the world, so I am not 100% certain how a correct response to a situation like this would look like. I know that she isn't being considerate of the health and safety of others, the general ambiance of the area is also affected. She seems to have no problem putting her opinions/habits out there to inconvenience other patrons.
7. Sean said the following at 4:41 AM on Jul 2:
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Bless you and thank you very much for your honesty.
I believe at some point we have all
have "been" one of the characters in
"that" Bible study,and prayerfully I
hope that changes as we all grow and
mature in our relationship with Christ.
8. Kiwi Bloke said the following at 6:35 AM on Jul 2:
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I certainly wouldn't feel like a jerk making such a comment like that; nor would I consider it wrong to do so. It sounds like you weren't intending to be deliberately malicious with your comment. And more to the point, I think people who smoke cigarettes in the near presence of others (as this lady was) are very rude. I would be totally in favour of it being illegal to do so.
In any case, I don't see why it's wrong to make it publically clear that you find the smell of smoke to be offensive. We shouldn't be afraid to speak the truth, even if doing so might offend someone's delicate sensibilities. And a bit of social pressure against smokers - letting them know that it's socially unacceptable to smoke near others - wouldn't be a bad thing. What's wrong with reminding them that their actions are negatively affecting others around them, and perhaps (hopefully) letting them feel a little bit of shame for it? I think the sense of public shame that used to exist in our cultures many years ago wasn't necessarily a bad thing. :)
9. Vanessa said the following at 6:54 AM on Jul 2:
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There is a difference between being judgmental of someone smoking...and obvious disdain at not being able to enjoy the great outdoors without choking.
While I have many friends who are smokers (some who are believers who are trying desperately to quit), I have met only one who is polite enough to ask if cigarette smoke is a bother, drags quickly and discreetly, extinguishes the cigarette quickly, and does NOT litter with the butts. Most smokers (even most of my friends) are not that considerate.
Offhand comments may not be the best witness, but I think the woman smoking should have been just as embarrassed that she was causing others physical discomfort as you were that you may have caused emotional discomfort.
10. obewan said the following at 7:58 AM on Jul 2:
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I don't mind smokers so much in the outside wide-open spaces. However, inside can be a major problem for me. My worst allergy is tobacco smoke. Just a small exposure to second hand smoke can induce a major asthma attack.
Years ago, I was spending several hundred dollars a month on a pulmonary specialist and allergy treatments for asthma. I did not have a clue what was wrong. He tested me, and tobacco was the number one hit.
Shortly after, my workplace banned smoking completely. When that happened, the asthma problems went away along the all the medical treatments!
Smokers really must be made aware of how they trample the rights of others when they insist on "smokers rights".
11. Ashley Harris said the following at 8:11 AM on Jul 2:
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James,
Do you mean the article's story or my story? I'm pretty sure the article was fiction ;)
12. Angie said the following at 8:26 AM on Jul 2:
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The last paragraph of your article really spoke to me. Thank you.
13. Chad said the following at 8:46 AM on Jul 2:
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While I agree we shouldn't be rude, there is nothing wrong with asking someone not to endanger your health with their own vices. Besides the (well-proven) long-term dangers of secondhand smoke, some of us with asthma and allergies have very immediate issues with smoke. It is not un-Christian to (politely) ask someone else to not endanger your health needlessly.
14. Patricia C said the following at 9:23 AM on Jul 2:
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I don't smoke; I don't enjoy the smell but my neighbors smoke. My Christian friends hate to be outside of my house when they are around and try to pull me in. But I try consider every moment with my neighbors a chance to witness and display the love of Christ to them. Yes, they smoke around me and sometimes I can smell the smoke in my hair after wards but we get talking for a while and they share their burdens with me knowing that I will pray for them. I wasn't a Christian my whole life and ever since then I've felt like I've had to play catch up since I'm kinda "rough around the edges," as one of my friends so aptly put it, when it comes to Christian culture. Jesus brought the Gospel to us through tortuous discomfort via the cross. Likewise, while on earth He chose to hang out with us-- enemies of His Father and the poor in spirit. Do you think the lepers or the poor smelled nice? But His love eclipsed all His discomfort toward us. Therefore, I can and we should endure this minuscule discomfort for His sake to bring the good news to our neighbors and to the world.
15. Ronnica said the following at 9:39 AM on Jul 2:
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Ouch. It's sad when we allow our personal opinions (no matter how valid) become barriers for the gospel. For me it might not be a comment about smoking, but it might be a comment about something else liked education or parenting.
16. Megan said the following at 10:55 AM on Jul 2:
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"In my experience, when God puts people around me it's not because other parts of the planet were too crowded." WOOOOOO girl, you were speaking right to me with that line! I know that all too often I get frustrated with people around me because I have my own agenda to accomplish, whether it's personal or work related (and I work in customer service!) Thank you for the reminder.
17. Cat said the following at 11:55 AM on Jul 2:
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I don't understand. If the cigarette smoke was bugging you, or the homeless guy's smell why not suggest having the study outside? C'mon people!
What would Christ have done? Condemn smoking, worry about a little smell? Or would hehave welcomed these people with open arms and preached love. I'm kind of disgusted and disappointed by the snotty and frankly, unloving attitudes on here.
18. Kristina said the following at 1:13 PM on Jul 2:
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Everyone is going on about smoking in public (which I also agree is rude), but I think the main point here is that not every thought and feeling we have always needs to come out of our mouth because they can also be rude and offensive and cause others discomfort. (James 3:8-10)
I learned this the hard way very recently and may have lost a dear friend AND been a bad witness for Christ in the process. The blessing though is that I have finally learned to really think before I speak.
Thanks for reminding me that I'm not the only one with diarrhea of the mouth sometimes. =)
19. Tamara (from Canada) said the following at 2:43 PM on Jul 2:
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Absolutely, we shouldn't be forced to be subjected to second-hand smoke continually. I won't argue that one, but I think there are times when we don't handle those things very well. Sometimes, that offhand comment may be the final straw that pushes that person away from Christ, or at minimum from the gathering of any kind of Christian community.
For a long time, I was one of those people who would make comments about people smoking around me, until I had the damage that those comments can make to someone hit close to home. My sister and her (now) fiance walked away from the church during their growing up years and have started smoking. They are working very hard to quit and making much success, but still are smoking a bit. This past Christmas Eve they came to church with the rest of the family, as they are also getting back on the "right track" spiritually.
As we were walking in to the church to take our seats, someone made a comment about how people who smoke are disgusting and shouldn't be in a church. It was very obvious that they both heard the person say that, and I'm , quite honestly, surprised they didn't turn around and leave right then and there. They stayed for the service (had I been in their shoes I would have walked out immediately), but left the minute it was over and have said many times in the 6 months since that comment that they won't be back if that's what people think of them. They have become some of the people who believe and follow Jesus (and are making life changes to do so better), but want absolutely nothing to do with the people of God.
This situation got me thinking about how often judgmental words like that come out of my mouth and what kind of an impact they are having on people who may be honestly seeking God. Yes, the Bible calls us to a higher standard of living. But does the Bible not also say that Jesus came for the sick and not the healthy? If we're going to judge the sick that we come into contact with, then how are we really doing at living out the Great Commission which we have been left to do?
All of this makes me think of a service that my church holds in the downtown core of my city where the homeless and working poor live. There is one statement in their mission/vision for what they are doing that really sticks with me. It says (the part that sticks with me, I can't remember all of it right now): " . . . in an environment where judgment is left at the door." In this service, you have lawyers and doctors sitting next to and worshipping with and loving and caring for the recovering drug addict or the single mom whose barely making ends meet. This is what it should be. And I think the key to it is leaving judgment at the door. This doesn't mean that you don't call people to a higher standard - it means that you make that call out of a love for them and a desire to see them come to know Jesus as their Savior and Lord. A smoker is not a disgusting person - they are a sinful person who need to come to know Jesus as Savior and Lord, the same as we all were at one point in our lives.
20. IMO said the following at 3:04 PM on Jul 2:
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#19 Why did your sister let one stranger's comment affect her so much? Does she really believe that this stranger represents the church?
Or is this an excuse to have nothing to do with "the people of God" and the church?"
(I definitely think that stranger's comment was rude, offensive, and actually quite ignorant...and I may have spoken up...seriously, how dare somebody say something like that???)
21. Louise from Chicago said the following at 3:29 PM on Jul 2:
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I too am guilty of making rude comments about people who smell like cigarette smoke.
I have heard it is a difficult habit to quit.
Maybe from now on I'll keep quiet if the person isn't actually smoking in front of me.
22. DannieA said the following at 7:13 PM on Jul 2:
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Our body is a Temple and that is why I don't smoke, do drugs, or drink.
However, some people make other choices that I don't like. I have mixed feelings about how we are snuffing out people's right to choose their own behavior. After all what's next....no health care because someone is obese?
After all, in a public place, if we don't like the smoke, we can always move.
I'd err on thinking before speaking, however, If someone has an allergy or health issue and there is a confined space I feel it's appropriate to say something...
23. Heidi said the following at 10:11 PM on Jul 2:
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While I agree that second-hand smoke is dangerous to one's health, what about that verses that speak of laying down our lives for each other?
24. Kiwi Bloke said the following at 4:37 AM on Jul 3:
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Tamara, there's a world of difference between making a comment that someone's cigarette smoke (when they're standing in your vicinity) is undesirable/nausiating/offensive, and making a comment that smokers *themselves* are disgusting (not the habit, but the person), and that such people don't belong in church. The latter is, of course, highly offensive and absolutely unloving and un-Christian, and I would certainly be having strong words with any person in my church who made such a comment.
However, I nevertheless don't see anything unloving or un-Christianlike in commenting about someone smoking next to you. As other posters have mentioned, the smell of secondhand smoke can trigger asthma or allergies, or even give you a headache or make you feel nauseous. Reminding smokers that their actions negatively affect those around them is not wrong - it's being truthful - they need to learn that their behaviour is selfish and harmful.
It's not the fact that people smoke, in and of itself, that bothers me so much - it's when they do it while standing close to other people, without any consideration for them, that really irritates me. It's their lack of consideration. As Vanessa (#9) wrote, of all her friends who are smokers, only one bothers to be considerate about it. Seems to be the common trend amongst many smokers.
But I don't see how there is an incompatibility between making it clear that smoking next to other people is unappreciated, and still being able to show love and care towards people who do smoke. It's possible to do both. A good friend of mine from my church 20s & 30s group smokes - she's also a Christian - she knows that I don't like her smoking, and fortunately she's considerate enough not to smoke around others. But sometimes I'll go join her outside when she's smoking so she's not alone out there (I'll be standing a couple of meters away of course, but that doesn't bother her - she appreciates the company).
I also think it's possible to evangelise or be a good witness to people who smoke while still maintaining your own boundaries on the issue. For example, if you were running a downtown homeless shelter, I think it would be perfectly valid to have a "no smoking" policy inside the premises. Why would that hinder your witness to the people who came there? You're still able to show them love and care.
Or take the fictional situation with Jeremy and Cindy's bible study. Actually I found that story to be a bit over the top - I couldn't imagine a situation like that happening in the real world, with Christians really responding like that. Do such Christians really exist? In any case, the story seems to be implying that the hosts should have had no problem with Helen smoking in their house, or the homeless guy dumping his trash everywhere. But I disagree. The Christians there could very easily have lovingly welcomed those visitors into their home, without having to compromise on decency. It would be a simple case of saying to Helen, "we are SO glad to have you here this evening, you are very welcome in our home! However the rest of us here are non-smokers, so why don't you step outside to finish your cigarette, and I'll come outside with you to keep you company - I'd very much like to get to know you!" Then the host and maybe one other can step outside with Helen and use the chance to strike up a conversation with her. In doing so, Helen feels valued and welcome, and she also knows that you're being truthful with her, and I think she'd appreciate that truthfulness all the more. If you would just pretend like her smoking indoors was not a problem, and act like her cigarette was invisible, she'd see right through that pretense - she's surely not stupid. Better to be honest with her - tell her she's welcome in your home, but we don't smoke in this house - but go outside with her - I couldn't imagine that she wouldn't be anything but delighed with how welcome you had made her feel, and that you had not treated her smoking judgementally. I think non-Christians appreciate us most when we are honest and "real", not false and superficial.
25. charlie said the following at 9:47 AM on Jul 3:
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I'm incredibly surprised that anybody sees smoking as a barrier to friendship and feels the need to let smokers know that they smell bad/waste their money/are killing themselves etc...it might come as a bit of a surprise to some of you but I can pretty much guarantee that they already know! They don't need you to make them feel bad! Addiction to anything is a symptom of a deeper issue, why are we so focussed on getting people to 'get their act together' rather than showing them the all-embracing, all-consuming love of God?!
We're not called to define people by their sin but by God's incredible love for them as people he has created. Yet it seems we've become so obsessed with appearances, about making sure we're not doing the 'wrong thing' and only ever being seen to do the 'right thing' that we've completely forgotten it's about the heart. And the funny thing is that if the heart isn't right, even the 'right thing' very quickly becomes the wrong thing. Sorry to rant but I get really frustrated when we see it as our 'Christian Burden' to bring judgement and show disdain in order to bring about the change we see as necessary, when it's God's kindness that leads to repentance and our ultimate priority is to love people with everything we've got.
26. Tamara (from Canada) said the following at 2:30 PM on Jul 3:
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#20 IMO asks:
#19 Why did your sister let one stranger's comment affect her so much? Does she really believe that this stranger represents the church?
Or is this an excuse to have nothing to do with "the people of God" and the church?"
--------------------------------------
Part of the reason my sister walked away from follow Christ initially as a teenager was because of the backstabbing way other Christians (both teenagers and adults) had treated her. She had finally come to the point where she was willing to give the people of God in the church another chance, and this comment blew it. She was in a position, because of past experiences, where she was going to be hyper-sensitive to any comment any person made.
So, yes, in some ways, she probably did take this stranger's comment to be representative of the church as a whole.
As for the last part of the question, about it being an excuse to have nothing to do with the people of God . . . NO, it's not an excuse! I know without a doubt from our conversations over the months since this incident that she deeply desires Christian community and is looking for it in other ways than going to a church. I could go explaing why this is the way she feels, but I honestly don't feel that I need to be explaing/defending my sister from people who suggest she was looking for an excuse to stay away from the church without really knowing her heart and where she is coming from.
27. Meg said the following at 3:45 PM on Jul 3:
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"Look also at ships: although they are so large and are driven by fierce winds, they are turned by a very small rudder wherever the pilot desires. Even so the tongue is a little member and boasts of great things. See how great a forest a little fire kindles! And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell.
For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and creature of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by mankind. But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not be so.
Does a spring send forth fresh water and bitter from the same opening? Can a fig tree, my brethren, bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Thus no spring yields both salt water and fresh.
Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.
But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace." James 3: 4-18 NKJ
Last night, at a camp chapel service, the wranglers were sitting in the back--and they were terribly smelly from the muck in the corrals. I thought about making an "off-hand" comment to my friend about the smell wafting through the congregation, but chose to bite my tongue instead.
My intention would not have been to purposely hurt the wranglers, but "voice my opinion/displeasure," because I "have the right to."
Would I have been "peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy" if I had made my comment? Would I have been a good example for the campers, of how a Christ follower behaves--of Who Jesus is? Do I put my self first, or others?
God's ultimate plan would not have been derailed if I had failed to react the way He wanted me to--He's bigger than that; but, I'm sure He would have been even more hurt than the wranglers.
"Be careful little mouth what you say . . ."
28. Emily said the following at 11:28 AM on Jul 4:
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I can't believe we are having this conversation. If somebody's cigerette smoking is bugging you - just politely ask them to move and smoke elsewhere or not smoke. As an ex-smoker, I know that smoking is not healthy and it makes you smell, etc, but you can't assume that a smoker, if the person is a believer, is less of a believer or weaker than one who is not a smoker.
The smokers I know are from a variety of cultures and personalities and religious backgrounds. I have other Christian friends who are smokers - in fact, one who smokes heavily and I still see him as a brother, nothing more, nothing less.
29. BDB said the following at 12:31 AM on Jul 5:
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On a mission trip I discovered that my sense of smell isn't very good. We were inside a tropical market - and a couple of members got sick and had to go outside due to the smell. I could smell it, but it didn't bother me nearly that much.
I've heard it said that Americans smell like soap.
I'll grant you that cigar and pipe smoke are much more pleasant than cigarette smoke. I choose not to partake of that habit. And I'll admit that since the various indoor smoking bans took place, dining out is much more pleasant. I'm sure it's really good for those with health issues that affect their breathing.
But we should take care to not be deliberately rude when we cross paths with someone whose culture is more accepting of tobacco. The habit will help one adapt to other cultures while travelling without reverting to rudness. Makes for a more pleasant trip.
30. obewan said the following at 6:03 AM on Jul 6:
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One of the women in our church singles group just quit smoking and has gone 25 days cold turkey. No shots or nicotine gum or anything. Just the Holy Spirit.
She has always been a strong believer except for this one issue - she never had the faith to try to quit. Then she decided to just try.
It makes me happy. I could never be interested in dating a smoker because of my allergies. Now I may have to rethink things with her. She has always expressed an interest in me.
I worry too about marrying a smoker who might someday have lung cancer with all the expense and problems. A woman I work with was a smoker for about 20 years, and now she has been out for 9 months and is dying from lung cancer.
31. Jo said the following at 3:33 PM on Jul 6:
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Obewan, 30
"I worry too about marrying a smoker who might someday have lung cancer with all the expense and problems."
An ex-smoker would still be a risk for this. And, well, anyone you meet might be a risk for getting something problematic and expensive.
32. BDB said the following at 10:28 PM on Jul 6:
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Thought about this article today.
I was attempting to turn left on a busy street, waiting for oncoming traffic to clear.
The guy behind me in the left turn lane got tired of waiting - went around me on the left, then cut across all three lanes of traffic to the right lane - directly in front o my path.
A variety of non-Christian responses crossed my mind.
And he was smoking, flicking ashes out the window. Ah, yes, nothing like a smoker to demonstrate a complete inability to consider the affect of their actions on othrers.
Reminds me of the last 50-cent-per pack tax that Californians passed on cigarettes to fund early childhood programs. I always vote against taxes. But this day, the day I was filling out my absentee ballot, someone ahead of me flicked ashes onto my windshield.
I voted for the tax.
Incidentally, in Southern California, people throwing out a lit cigarette can cause a wildfire, destroying homes and killing people. I have little sympathy for those who put others at risk.
33. Jo said the following at 1:43 AM on Jul 7:
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"Ah, yes, nothing like a smoker to demonstrate a complete inability to consider the affect of their actions on othrers."
there are a few comments like this... i can't help thinking they're extremely unfair. it's going a bit far to suggest that lack of consideration and smoking always go hand in hand. it is an addiction after all, cut them some slack. and i say that as someone who's at far greater risk than most of you from cigarette smoke.
what percentage of americans smoke, i wonder? i know LOADS of people who do, many are friends of mine and virtually all of them are very considerate about it.
34. BDB said the following at 6:54 PM on Jul 7:
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Jo (#33) wrote:
>>there are a few comments like this... i can't help thinking they're extremely unfair. it's going a bit far to suggest that lack of consideration and smoking always go hand in hand.<<
There are definitely cultural differences. In the U.S., it's illegal and hazardous to flick ashes and burning cigarettes out the car window. That's what the ashtray is for. Yet people do it all the time. Someday I'm going to spray one of them with a fire extinguisher.
I'm reminded of a story I read about cell phones once. The reporter was in Asia somewhere inundated by listening to other people's mobile phone conversations. He was expecting it to be much worse on a planned visit to Scandanavia, which has the highest mobile phone usage in the world.
But that's not what happened. Instead, people were very polite and careful not to interrupt others, or be in other people's face with it.
I've never had a rude experience with a cigar or pipe smoker.
35. Lindsay said the following at 5:27 PM on Jul 8:
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Ashley, I love how your brain works and how you express what's going on inside your head. A question I had while reading your post was, "How could Biblical love be expressed in this situation?" Smoking is certainly unpleasant, but you make a good point- for some it's not just a matter of putting up with the smell- it's a health risk. If I still wore a WWJD bracelet, (don't judge, you wore one too) now would be the time to consult my wrist. The Bible tells us we have a responsibility to protect ourselves, as well as to love others. I think it's safe to say that willingly breathing in secondhand smoke without protecting your lungs and making snide remarks that are meant to heap guilt and shame on the smoker are both wrong. I think the better response is somewhere in the middle, between the two extremes.
I guess this is evidence that knowing how to love like Christ and having the ability to do so takes time and maturity. Please continue wrestling out loud!