The Needy Outside My Window
by Heather Koerner on 12/18/2008 at 8:27 AM
What's outside your window?
Maybe you're like me. A peek outside reveals the manicured lawns and minivans of suburban life. Or maybe you see something different, like city sidewalks full of bustle, or acres of crops and pasture.
A recent Boundless article challenged me to look for something else outside my window: the needy.
The article retold Leo Tolstoy's tale of Martin, the Russian cobbler who waited one day for a promised visit from Jesus. Throughout the day, as Martin watched and waited, he saw several needy people, invited them into his home, and fed and clothed them. At the end of the day, Jesus revealed that He did, indeed, visit Martin, but it was through the needy that Martin served.
After reading the story, I was bothered and couldn't exactly figure out why. In my most recent Boundless article, I wrote:
I turned off the computer and sat for a second.
You see, God, that's a good story. Really, it is. I get it. But when I look out of my window, I just see neighbors. Not starving neighbors. Not neighbors in need of a coat. Just well-fed, well-clothed neighbors...
I had this nagging feeling that the Lord expected something of me, but I wasn't sure what it was.
After having what I called a "twenty-four hour whine to God":
That next morning, as I dried my hair, I blurted it out frustration. Lord, I want to do it. I really do. If there was a young, starving mom walking just outside my window, I'd want you to show me and I'd want to help. I don't know why, but I feel like you expect me to do something. But, God, there's no one.
There, I'd said it. The words felt like they were still hanging there in the air.
There's no one.
Of course, the story didn't end there. There was someone, the Lord revealed. Someone who was, just about, right outside my window. And there were lessons for me to learn. Things like being open to on-the-spot obedient giving, developing relationships with those in need and asking the Lord where He wants me to give.
So, today you might try taking a look outside your window and asking the Lord for wisdom. He just might show you someone in need where you never expected to find him.
1. B. Marie said the following at 10:55 AM on Dec 18:
I think it is also important to remember that need isn't always financial. I believe that emotional needs are as important as physical needs, and they are often harder to discern. Many people are lonely or in need of someone to just listen to them. I find it easy to just go about my day and only think about my needs instead of looking for ways to help others. The key is to ask God to reveal Himself and show us how we can serve and help others, and He will.
2. Texas Craig said the following at 10:06 AM on Dec 19:
I think it is also important to not limit ourselves to the people literally right around us when applying the Tolstoy story.
Our "windows" are much broader now. When I am watching television and see a story about devastation in Bangledesh or people dying in Africa from lack of basic medical care, God has effectively brought those people by my "window" and He is saying to me "what are you going to do?"
We have been commanded to "go to all the world." In Matthew 25, the sheep are praised for visiting those in prison (i.e., they "went" to serve). Jesus sent His disciples out two by two. Paul took an offering from a church in one city in order to give it to the needy in another city. These are all examples of us not waiting to just help the needy immediately around us, but rather being proactive to help others in other places. In the world we live in today, my "neighbor" includes the orphan in China, or the poor in India. To think otherwise is, in my opinion, an effort to relieve ourselves from guilt and responsibility.
So, yes, definitely look for the needs around you. And, those needs will include emotional needs, as well as physical needs. But, also remember that any needs that you have become aware of (via television, radio, etc.) are, in essence, "right outside your window."
Let us not give up in doing good!
3. obewan said the following at 10:58 AM on Dec 19:
The Christmas newsletter from our church this year focused on the unseen needy hidden in the suburbs.
Many families in our church have nice homes, once had nice jobs, but are now unemployed are facing forclosures and homelessness. The counseling center at our church has been swamped with stressed family leaders since the economy went sour.
4. Rachael said the following at 12:36 PM on Dec 19:
Nice post! I think it can be easy to overlook the needs of the people we see in day-to-day life.
5. Ame said the following at 4:36 PM on Dec 19:
The first Christmas after my ex husband moved out, our Sunday school teacher called me and asked if we needed anything for Christmas. I told him that the girls had enough presents but what we didn't have was a place to go on Christmas day. There was no family. My girls and I had been sick. I was exhausted mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I told him I didn't even have the strength to cook a meal for us on Christmas day.
My Sunday school teacher was on staff at our mega-church over national missions. The co-teacher was on staff over international missions. Most of the people in the class went on multiple missions trips every year. They knew my divorce was due to my husband's continued unfaithfulness and that I had spent 2 1/2 years in intense, biblical therapy.
I was touched that he called to ask. I was devestated when they never called back. Period. Not a meal, not an invitation into anyone's home. Just ignored and left alone.
Yes, we had a warm house and money for food and clothes and presents, but no one cared for us. They would have gladly given us money for gifts, but they couldn't care a less to meet our real needs.
I've found, through divorce, that people want to meet the needs that are convenient for them to meet. People rarely want to meet the needs that need to be met.
I think that often in the church we are so focused on being "good stewards of what God has given us" that we often overlook the part of just letting go.
I remember a Focus radio program once where a single mom was told to give a family $300.00. The family asked if they could use the money for a specific purpose. The single mom told the family that God had told her to give them the money, so she gave. What the family chose to do with the money was their choice; she was just glad to give - and then to let go.
The following Thanksgiving my girls and I had been sick again. A week-long stomach virus was in-process going through our home, one person at a time. I was exhausted beyond exhausted with no family to help. My friends also had young children and didn't want to catch the virus. I had had so little sleep for so long. I had towels and sheets with throw up on them going through my washer for several weeks and couldn't keep up. One morning when I was beyond depleted, I called the same mega-church and asked for help. Granted, I was an exhausted mom and cried and hung up the phone when they said they couldn't help. I sent an email to ask for help (I was delerious, obviously, to ask twice) and the pastor called irritated with me. I had offended the receptionist when I hung up without saying anything - he didn't care that I was crying and couldn't speak. I told him I needed help, that it would be so helpful if someone could come in and help wash all these clothes and towels and sheets and perhaps care for my sick babies while I took a nap. He said to me, "IF I can find someone, and I doubt I can, but IF I can find someone to come help you, you need to accept whatever they choose to do for you and not ask for anything more." This was after he and I had had some verbal and email conversations about how the church could help single-mom's. Within an hour or two he emailed me to say he couldn't find anyone to help.
I think we need to redefine "need." We, in the church in general, get so fixated on defining the needs of people whose shoes we've never even seen much less walked in that we don't take the time to simply ask them what they need ... and then be willing to do what we can to help. The thing is, most of the time it begins with developing a relationship with someone so they will feel safe sharing with us their need. It's much easier to have a check-list to mark items off than to give the time to get to know someone ... and then to care.
6. Texas Craig said the following at 9:40 PM on Dec 20:
Ame:
I am truly sorry for your situation. I hope you have found a better experience at whatever church you are at now. There is no excuse for the type of indifference that was shown to you.
I have served in care ministries with a couple of churches and I have never heard or seen of anything like that. In my last church, they had a list of over 500 people that were willing to meet needs as they arose, and they sent out an email any time a need was brought to their attention. To my knowledge, every need that was ever raised was addressed by someone (they always sent out confirmations of the need being met, i.e., as soon as someone had stepped up to take care of it).
7. Ame said the following at 8:16 AM on Dec 29:
Texas Craig - just now remembering to come back to this and saw your comment. thank you. and, to be honest, finding a church that works for all three of us continues to be challenging. the church we've gone to last, which we will probably continue to attend, is difficult for my special needs daughter. also, they have no inreach and never called us, or call us. from the beginning i have had to contact them to ask where we can plug in or any other questions. they answer, but they don't follow up.
your care ministry in your church sounds amazing - perhaps i can find a church that cares that much someday, whether or not i need the care.