Body Language to Get the Job
by Suzanne Hadley Gosselin on 11/06/2008 at 10:36 AM
Finding a job can be nerve-racking. You prepare your resume, dress professionally and prep yourself to say all the right things. But something unconscious might be affecting your job interview more than you think: body language.
According to an article on MSN:
Recent studies have shown that employers will form an opinion of you within the first 10 minutes of the interview.
But here's the kicker: It's not always based on what you actually say, but on something we term "body language." For instance, 85 percent of what you communicate is not with words. It's through the tone of your voice, the way you sit and a wealth of other messages that your body involuntarily sends. This is according to Greg Hartley, a body language expert who earned his chops with 20 years as an interrogator in the Army.
The article offers six tips, including "be real from the start," "mind your hands and arms," and "sit up straight." Consider these body language gems: Steepling your fingers makes you appear arrogant, crossing your ankles says you'd rather be somewhere else and touching your ears or nose makes it seem like you're holding something back.
In social settings, I have to fight crossing my arms. I've heard this makes a person seem closed-off or defensive. In my case, I have very long arms and I sometimes don't know what to do with them. What are your body language foibles?
1. obewan said the following at 11:06 AM on Nov 6:
I had a job interview once where the manager told the headhunter that sent me he did not like my body language during the interview. It did make me think, but at the end of the day he was a jerk anyway and I did not want to work for him, so maybe I could not fake it well enough to win him over with my body language.
I am glad I did not get that job, because instead I would up in a far better position with a wonderful Christian boss. Body language was never a problem for the job I wanted. My enthusiasm was obvious.
2. Matt from DC said the following at 11:08 AM on Nov 6:
When I started reading this article I had just crossed my ankles... how telling.
3. Colette said the following at 11:33 AM on Nov 6:
haha...my problem is getting to the interview. Interviewing has always gone well for me, but getting there is the hard part.
The tough thing for me with body language tends to be that because I'm short (5'1"), sometimes my feet don't reach the floor. It makes me feel like a little kid and I'm never quite sure what to do.
4. Caiti said the following at 11:55 AM on Nov 6:
I find myself covering my mouth/touching my nose when I'm speaking with people I don't know well. It took me a long time to realize I was doing it, but I finally figured out I was sort of hiding.
It's sort of automatic now, and I'm trying to stop. It was funny, though, the other day I said hi to a new girl at our church, and noticed I was covering my mouth, and when she spoke back, she did the same thing!
5. Jacob said the following at 12:10 PM on Nov 6:
Additionally, standing with your arms at your sides is much more open than standing with your hands in your pockets. In the latter, you look like you don't know what to do, so if you're a greeter at a store (or as a camp counselor welcoming families), keep your hands and arms at your side (and never sit down in sight of customers).
6. KJ said the following at 12:18 PM on Nov 6:
I was once accused of looking angry and attitudinal in church because I was sitting near the front with my arms crossed. The reason was that I had gained some weight and was uncomfortable with my stomach sticking out (the situation was severe enough that I was getting asked if I was pregnant!) so I was consciously trying to cover it up.
7. Suzanne said the following at 12:48 PM on Nov 6:
Does anyone have a tendency to mirror the body language of the person you're talking to (to Caiti #4's point)? I do this all the time and consciously have to change my position so I'm not a copycat.
8. Derek Wong said the following at 12:56 PM on Nov 6:
I notice that I probably touch my nose more often than I intend to. Why? I have no idea, but perhaps I can stop it (and other miscellaneous strange habits) now that I'm aware of them.
9. Laura_mh said the following at 1:28 PM on Nov 6:
When I'm nervous, I start twirling my hair.
(I have never done that in a job interview, however.)
10. Tami said the following at 1:28 PM on Nov 6:
Suzanne, I wouldn't try to eliminate that totally. It's a sign of rapport, which some people find comforting/confirming.
11. Tigger said the following at 1:49 PM on Nov 6:
I also mirror body language and notice when others do it to me, though I don't mean to do it in the first place. It's supposed to be a sign of compassion and empathy and demonstrate that someone is truly listening and caring. In a conversation between equals, it can often show you who is [more] dominant.
Body language books often mention that touching your face can appear dishonest - you are hiding something, or that you are uncomfortable. I have a hard time with his out of habit, but at least I don't play with my hair!
Basically your hands need to be visible but quiet. Put them in your lap if you're sitting, or lay your arms across your knees if you're leaning forward. It makes a sort of basket that someone can put things into - makes you look reliable and trustworthy. Leaning back can indicate comfort or arrogance. Leaning forward can indicate desperation or eagerness. This depends heavily on how you present yourself.
If standing just have them at your side or doing something useful like clasping your purse or holding your jacket. Don't put them in your pockets, don't clasp them behind your back. McCain's wife did this on tv this past week and looked like a schoolgirl trying to hide her crossed fingers. I couldn't believe nobody had coached her on this.
As for leg position with men...well, and women, don't sit with legs wide open. It's a dominance posture for men. (Dunno about women. Bad manners, I suppose.)
And above all, don't just consider it in the interview. The secretary may be asked her opinion, and frankly, most people have no idea why they think something about a person other than a vague feeling, which they likely got from posture, body language, attitude, and presentation.
One more thing: these are not hard and fast rules. People who know them are capable of changing or misusing them. Others just react differently in different situations.
Finally, don't think too much about this during your interview. That will make you self-conscious and less comfortable...and thus harder to sell yourself. :)
12. Matthew S. said the following at 1:55 PM on Nov 6:
Suzanne (#7),
Yes, I've noticed that I can unconsciously mirror body language (my brother does this with speech and accents). What really strikes me as odd is the number of times I've done some motion (scratch my head, cross my legs, etc.) at almost the same time as someone else. It's hard to tell if they're mirroring me or vice versa. One or two times it's seemed like I was thinking about making some movement (in the next half second) only to have the person I was talking to do it before I did. Weirdness.
13. Suzanne said the following at 3:43 PM on Nov 6:
Matthew S.—That's what we in improv refer to as "group mind."
14. Kirsty said the following at 6:24 PM on Nov 6:
The funny thing is when someone you are talking to starts wiping their nose or touching their nose...I tend to follow, thinking they are hinting at something that is on my nose...hmm.
15. kb said the following at 9:33 PM on Nov 6:
Ha...I too have long arms and often need a place to put them:) I also prefer to stand, which often makes others uncomfortable. "Sit down!" they tell me. Well, sitting makes me uncomfortable, how about that??
16. Mike Theemling said the following at 4:01 AM on Nov 7:
I think these are good tips but wouldn't say they are absolute unless it's chronic or overbearingly obvious. The only definite I'd say from the article is "be real from the start".
They can also be offset by positive body language such as good eye contact and natural smiles.
If you don't know what to do with your hands/arms, the best thing to do is to just leave them at your side or in your lap. I tend to do the arm on thigh thing myself (right hand on left thigh, with other hand on top, or vice versa).
17. Katrece said the following at 12:58 PM on Nov 8:
Aahh!! I try so hard not to cross my arms. I was trained not too several years ago (in junior high job training), but still am reminded to not do so by a nagging voice in my brain. I just can't stand to put my hands at my side. It feels like I'm some army cadet.
For years, my brain has constantly prodded me when I may be portraying a negative image through my body language.
I was interviewed earlier this week. As soon as I crossed my arms during the interview that voice was shouting at me to uncross my arms. I try hard not too because I know it seems that you're stand-offish (at an interview, or in general).
Suzanne, I am happily convicted & glad I won the war with body signals this week. Thanks for the reminder to speak professionally with my mouth and body signals :)
18. Web Jobs said the following at 5:01 AM on Nov 11:
Just add one more thing. Wear something thats impressive. Dont turn up at your interview in unimpressive clothes. Because impression formation begins at the first glimpse. If you look presentable only then you will be considered a serious candidate for the position.
Besides this: be honest and confident in your interview.