Summer Suggestions: Be Kind
by Suzanne Hadley Gosselin on 08/11/2008 at 3:59 PM
A few summers ago, I was moving...again. It was the third time in three years, and I felt guilty asking people to help me. That's probably why I found myself pitifully low on help that Sunday afternoon. As I was in the process of melting down, my friend Deb called. Close to tears, I explained my dilemma.
Deb said, "Don't' worry. I'm at church. I'll recruit some guys."
An hour later she arrived with nine men, three pick-up trucks and a van in tow. I was overwhelmed by the show of generosity. Many of the guys I had never even met, yet they gave up their Sunday afternoon to haul my oak furniture down three flights of stairs. I felt relieved...and blessed.
That experience taught me to look more carefully for those around me who could use a boost of encouragement or a helping hand. I'll admit: Helps is not my spiritual gift. I balk at jumping in to serve every time. But that doesn't matter. Those are the moments where I have the opportunity to be Jesus to others.
In "Practice Non-Random Acts of Kindness," I wrote about the power of specific kindness:
You hear a lot about random acts of kindness these days: scraping a stranger's windshield on a snowy day, paying for the order behind you at Taco Bell, leaving an anonymous note for someone.
I have been on the receiving end of such kindnesses, and they've brightened my day. But there are gifts that hold more power and impact than random good deeds. These acts of kindness tell someone that you know them. They communicate that you've noticed their needs. They demonstrate that you've made a sacrifice on their behalf.
To whom can you show kindness this summer? As Motte pointed out a few weeks ago, family vacations offer some great opportunities for practicing non-random kindness. Those summer moves, outdoor projects and church work days are also rife with opportunity. Deb's kindness saved the day, and those nine guys represented Christ's care for me in a small crisis. That's the kind of thing I want to pass on.
1. Mike said the following at 6:53 PM on Aug 11:
And the lesson to Suzanne is: If'n you don't ask, you don't get...
Glad those 9 Knights of the Round Oaken Tables showed up! :-)
2. Shaundra said the following at 8:28 PM on Aug 11:
You know Suzanne it would be so nice if more people had that understanding. The idea of being kind seems to be fading away out of peoples minds. The world we live in today is at such a fast pace that people tend to not have time to show kindness, but with comments like yours and examples like the one you wrote can shape a new tomorrow.
We have moved twice in the last year and a half and decided to do it alone in fear of burning bridges, and receiving an ear full a criticism. God works in in ways outside of our understanding when we couldn't count on the people we thought we could he placed strangers to give us just the right amount of help to get us through .
If everyone helped someone, no one would be in need, and the world would be a greater place.
Rather than hope for that day we as a family have committed to creating that day by helping at least one stranger a day.
We all must come to the understanding that we must walk by faith and know that we are not in the world's hands, but in the potter's hands, and he will make us whole.
From Believer's and Lover's of Jesus
Shaundra and Maurice
www.relationship-rescue-and-love-poems.com
3. Rachael said the following at 8:40 PM on Aug 11:
Awesome! Others' small acts of kindness are often noticeable...or taken for granted.
In class this quarter sometimes I've received little candies (and today it was a sun chip or two -- yum!!) from a student in class - it's fun. I was on the receiving end of a surprising act of kindness a few years ago -- a few years back, a group of people covered the cost of a hefty ticket I received. That act of generosity (and kind-of to an extent, redemption) really touched me.
On another note, although kindness can feel like a win-win situation, it may at times feel like a lose-win situation, but in the end God is our audience. Yes, as I've heard it said, "we have an audience of one."
4. cn said the following at 12:57 AM on Aug 12:
You know how Candice talks about having a strategy? Well, part of my strategy for spending time with my now fiancee, pre ring... pre first date, was asking him to help me move out of my apartment. Since he saw many of my belongings, we were able to have good conversations about areas where we found common interests. Ex. For some reason he was very interested in my high school point shoes. ;) My dad was helping too, so it provided great time for them to talk as they together wrestled a couches through door ways and put a puzzle of furniture neatly into a U-Haul.
The next day he took me out for ice cream. ;)
Follow up with those movers, Suzanne! Send them thank yous, make them dinner.. who knows!
5. Katherine said the following at 12:24 PM on Aug 12:
Wow, how fortunate for you, Suzanne! I've moved five times in the past nine months, and each time I've had to do it completely alone. Everyone I knew was either busy, or out of town, or moving themselves. In fact, once while I was moving I helped two other people with their moving. Of course, I tend to be more eager to help, but I am more likely to assume that I would be a burden to others and so don't ask for help as much as I might.
I was particularly impressed with the new church home of my brother and his family. Only a few weeks after they started going they had a medical crisis, which is hard enough on its own but they had two small children at the time. They were barely known at the church, yet the outpouring of love and support (many meals and even a collection of money) was amazing and truly priceless.
6. Tami said the following at 2:17 PM on Aug 12:
cn (4), that's really sweet. :)
7. BDB said the following at 2:31 PM on Aug 12:
cn (#4) brings up an interesting point.
I once knew a woman who told me that her "job" one Saturday was to call a guy who had agreed to help friend move. Specifically, she was to call him at noon and suggest that it was a good day to go out on his boat, so he had an excuse to leave.
I was too surprised to say much, and she followed up by saying that she had absolutely no problem doing that. It's a critical incident that made me realize how good looking people can sometimes be very unkind.
8. Rachael said the following at 10:43 AM on Aug 19:
About kindness. Recently I finished the amazing book "When Sinners Say 'I Do': Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage" (I highly recommend it --- lots of practical theology in there, and I think it could be helpful for non-marriage relationships as well). ANYWAY, in that book, Harvey points out that kindness isn't a personality trait, but that it's a fruit of the Spirit.
Good reminder, huh? Even if we don't "feel" kind or that we are lacking, we do have the power to be kind (or whatever) -- we have the Spirit in us! And remember 2 Peter 1:5-9. If we lack the good qualities mentioned in vs. 5-7, we've forgotten that we were cleansed from our former sins. There is some kind of connection between remembering the power of God in the forgiveness of our sins. I don't have it all down pat, but I want to learn how to apply the gospel to daily life. And I want to reflect on it more and discover and live in its power.