I Can Quit Any Time I Want To

Hi, my name is Tom, and I'm an addict.

I don't have a problem with the bottle or with any kind of pharmaceutical product, legal or illegal. No, my problem is with games. I'm addicted to them.

When in high school I was obsessed with bowling, to the point where if I saw a group of people standing around, I automatically calculated where I'd need to aim the bowling ball in order to knock them all over. I was a pinball junkie (if not a wizard), and then there was Pac-Man, Centipede and Galaxian. Many a quarter vanished into their maws as I sought a game fix. I then discovered computer solitaire, and I came to rue the day I put that first red "2" over a black ace.

And it's not just me. Perhaps you've read people who have died after gaming binges. It seems certain people are wired to become addicted to the unique stimuli provided by games, particularly video games. I suspect, without any real scientific proof, that this is much more a problem for guys than girls. In their book Playstation Nation, Kurt and Olivia Bruner estimate that as much as 35 percent of the population is prone. They provide a checklist of traits that should raise concern if parents see them in yourself or a friend:

Do you play almost every day?
Do you often play for long periods (over three to four hours at a time)?
Do you play for excitement?
Do you get restless and irritable if you can't play?
Do you sacrifice social and sporting activities to play?
Do you play instead of doing other things you should be doing-say, housework or studying?
Do you seem to be losing interest in real-life activities?

My particular "poison" these days is computer Scrabble. I play a game or two every day upon getting home from work, and if for some reason I can't I feel a bit agitated. In a previous generation I'd be the dad who comes home from work and pours himself a stiff drink. (I'm glad that looking for the ultimate triple-word score carries fewer potential problems than alcohol does.)

But this raises an important point: A lot of people think the only potential problem with video gaming is the content of the games themselves. Sex. Violence. Language. That certainly isn't a problem in Scrabble. You might not be aware that the very process of playing a perfectly "safe" game may be setting you up for future problems. There are far too many marriages in trouble because one partner -- almost always the husband -- has cleaved more to his Xbox than to his wife. (And c'mon, guys, how many of you are salivating over the upcoming release of Halo 3?)

Some of these scorned women have set up an online message board called Everquest Widows, where they discuss how that multiple-player online game has become a home-wrecker.

Ivan Spielberg, a contributor to The Psychology of Combating Stress, Depression and Addiction, explained, "Like any compulsive behavior, playing video games proves and escape from a reality that is often too painful to deal with. It is these issues that must be addressed in anyone who is suffering from an addiction."

What begins as a harmless pastime can become an escape. That escape becomes an emotional coping mechanism that, in turn, evolves into a full-blown addiction. And while the American Psychological Association has not yet taken a position on the addictiveness of video games, some in Europe have and moved to treat it. Last year Europe's first detox clinic for video gamers opened in Holland. Hyke van der Heijden, 28, a graduate of the Amsterdam program, started playing video games 20 years ago. By the time he was in college he was gaming about 14 hours a day and using drugs to play longer. "For me, one joint would never be enough, or five minutes of gaming would never be enough," he said. "I would just keep going until I crashed out."

So how about you? If you suspect you might be just a bit too fond of your video games, check out Online Gamers Anonymous. As with any addiction, admitting that you have a problem is the first step.

As for me and my electronic Scrabble jones, I can quit anytime I want. Really.

Comments

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1. Christina said the following at 12:00 PM on Sep 19:

lol...I started playing an MMORPG (World of Warcraft) when I started dating my last boyfriend. I really liked it...then I found a church home that I started going to consistently and the pastor kept expounding "is there anything keeping you from pursuing Christ with all your heart?"

Huh...well...maybe...yes...i suppose so. I haven't completely given it up, but my playing time has been cut to a third (if not less) of the time it used to be. Sometimes I miss it, simply because leaving my house to meet new people (and possibly a husband) is just downright intimidating.

Its so much easier to identify and flirt with the creepy female elf who talks like a guy...probly because you know you won't get that attached ;)

2. Mike Theemling said the following at 12:08 PM on Sep 19:

Sometimes I wonder why video games get such a bad rap when the answer would probably be yes for every question in regards to television:

Do you watch TV almost every day?
Do you often watch TV for long periods (over three to four hours at a time)?
Do you watch TV for excitement?
Do you get restless and irritable if you can't watch TV (your favorite show)?
Do you sacrifice social and sporting activities to watch TV?
Do you watch TV instead of doing other things you should be doing-say, housework or studying?
Do you seem to be losing interest in real-life activities?

So why so much outcry over video games and not other things like shopping or TV?

Not to say that video games are completely benign, but if we are going to point the finger at addiction, there needs to be evidence that it is more dangerous or prone than other activities out there.

3. Tom Neven said the following at 12:28 PM on Sep 19:

Mike Theemling

Sure, some people watch too much TV, but there's a fundamental difference between TV and video games. With TV you are passive; you just sit there and take it in. With video games, you are an active participant. The Bruners' book shows that entirely different parts of the brain are activated between the two activities, and some studies have shown that the same parts of the brain light up with both video game junkies and heroin addicts. No kidding!

4. Christina said the following at 12:40 PM on Sep 19:

The same could be said for books, as well. I used to be grounded from reading when I was younger, because I was using the books to escape from reality.

5. marc said the following at 12:57 PM on Sep 19:

Wow. Long post, and nearly all of it was original content! Are you sure you have permission to be posting, or did you maybe forget your lengthy outside-source quotations?

I kid.

Is there anything in this world that we can't turn into a perverse addiction? But here's a thought. The stronger the addiction, the greater the original good of the thing. Violence and the love of violent media has its roots in the desire to be Just and Strong. Trashy romance novels have their roots in the desire to be loved and cherished.

And so video games, along with movies, TV shows, and even fine literature that we hold up as the golden standard of free time usage, utilize the vehicle of fiction, of myth, to help us find deeper understandings of these innately good desires.

But we are called to live in this world, still.

And the problem of video games is that the time limits are those imposed by the games themselves (which are distant, if existent) or their players (which are distant, if existent). Movies end. TV shows end. Novels reach their final page. But the princess always seems to be in another castle, so we continue to quaff the nepenthe.

So how do we as believers enter this medium with open eyes and wisely take from it what is good and abandon it if it contains nothing profitable?

Let the Discourse continue!

6. mindlab said the following at 1:08 PM on Sep 19:

to Mike Theemling:

"So why so much outcry over video games and not other things like shopping or TV?"

Nail. Hammer. Head.

I would agree absolutely with your logic, and disagree absolutely with your (apparent) conclusion. Watching TV is just as wasteful a way to spend your time as are video games; persons who are addicted to TV as just as addicted as persons who are addicted to video games.

You are correct in identifying a societal double standard here. It sounds to me like you are trying to argue that video games are not as bad as the post makes them out to be, and there, I think, you ere.

Audio-visual media is a powerful medium for shaping the way the audience perceives the content presented. It is so powerful that it's more than just 'presentation' (like a book); I think it borders on 'inculcation.'

Here's to all the TV-less readers out there who don't have time to waste watching the idiot box.

7. Sara said the following at 2:14 PM on Sep 19:

Tom wrote,
"some studies have shown that the same parts of the brain light up with both video game junkies and heroin addicts. No kidding!"

In itself, that isn't a compelling bit of information. A person uses the same part of their body to give a pat on the back, and to punch someone.

But... Scrabble! Love that game! If I had internet access at home I'd no doubt be hooked, but as it is I have to wait for people to play with me, unless I want to play by myself.

That's one of the reasons online games are so addictive: there isn't the normal, everyday limitation of finding people to play your game with you. And once you get going, again, there aren't the normal, everyday side necessities and distractions to break the flow. You can even wear diapers if you really don't want to have to get up (you know, like the slot machine freaks at casinos).

8. Jade said the following at 2:44 PM on Sep 19:

I play Cubis or Text Twist for a quick decompress at work, it's certainly better for me than smoke break! Other than those two games, I don't play much, maybe Myst/Riven/Exile sometimes, and I don't really watch TV either. I guess I don't really find staring at a screen very relaxing since I do it all day at work.

9. Joy W. said the following at 3:21 PM on Sep 19:

Mindlab, I think you're being a bit extreme in your take on television. I used to be "TV-less" as you say, but I do have one now. I usually watch the news while I'm cooking supper and I have one show that I watch on a weekly basis. Does that make me an idiot because I watch the "idiot box?" I think not. I'm learning about what's going on the world without wasting valuable time, since I'm multitasking. And the one show I watch has so many literary, biblical, historical, and even scientific allusions that it's a mental exercise just to puzzle through it!

10. Athena said the following at 4:01 PM on Sep 19:

I have heard that the online Final Fantasy game released a while back was uber-addicting. This was especially true for players using the beta trial version, since they didn't have to pay for it. Also, you felt obligated to play constantly in order to keep up with the skill level of your peers. Gaming in this way can give players a false sense of worth and competence. In actuality, it can rob their chances to cultivate real-life bonds with people and develop confidence both at work and at school.

I believe that each person has a certain amount of what I call "passionate energy" wandering around in our bodies, just waiting to find a home. Addictions are extreme attachments that result from channeling that energy onto one thing. Imagine for a second how God can be glorified when we latch the energy onto Him and pursuits related to Him, instead of on addictive gaming!

11. Ted Slater said the following at 4:27 PM on Sep 19:

OK, so people can be addicted to TV, to shopping, to food.

That doesn't negate the original post.

Interesting that so many are looking for excuses not to deal with the intent behind the original post, instead looking to deflect it by referencing other potential addictions that weren't mentioned in the article.

I think Tom may have touched on something here. Not everyone who shops, watches TV ... or plays video games ... has a "problem," of course. But examine your own heart -- maybe you do have a problem.

12. Trin said the following at 6:13 PM on Sep 19:

I play video games, even some of those notoriously addicting online games, and I am looking forward to playing through Halo 3 with a friend starting next week. I also watch some TV, renting classics while I plan to watch two shows this season. I read a lot, modern, classics, and Christian living/theology. I take care what I choose and so don't find anything wrong with any particular activity.

"I can quit anytime I want. Really."

There's an account of Spurgeon and his cigar smoking habits that struck me once, where he made a deal with a friend/servant that he could go without for longer. He did, by several months. Whenever I find that one of my activities is affecting me negatively (consuming more time than it should or negatively affecting my mood or relationships, etc), I establish times to be apart from them, at least a month. Sometimes I have specific things I want to replace them, other times it gives me chance to explore more fulfilling activities. And it is a time long enough that useful habits can be formed.

I think we get too caught up trying to defend/attack the activities themselves when we should really be looking at what purpose and what effect they have in our lives. (I'm thinking that thought is not original, Na maybe...).

13. Mike Theemling said the following at 6:26 PM on Sep 19:

In response to some comments:

"some studies have shown that the same parts of the brain light up with both video game junkies and heroin addicts."

Ah yes, the infamous "some studies have shown" line. Studies have shown a lot of things. That we have evolved from apes. That we will run out of oil by 2050, etc. I'm certainly not saying that there shouldn't be studies or that there is no value to them, but we must always look at studies in perspective.

For example, take the many studies which reveals that chocolate "lights up" the same part of the brain as chocolate does (The nucleus accumbens). Obviously there is the factor of intensity and other effects of cocaine vs. chocolate, but to imply that heroine and video games are "the same" is a fallacy.

Mindlab also brings up a good point. And that is that how "serious" any addictive/compulsive behavior is laregly determined by society. Mindlab seems to believe that both video games and TV are on the same level of wastefulness and seriousness. Yet I'm sure many do say that video games are "worse". Maybe it's because those people watch enough television to answer "yes" for most of the questions above and don't want to incriminate themselves. Or perhaps TV is considered such a "normal" part of our passtime that expending 3-4 hours of TV watching a day is considered standard. (By the way mindlab, I do believe that television is largely "bubblegum for the brain" but do not feel the same way towards videogames. At least with some video games, thought is required).

Consider this. Not so many generations ago smoking, even chain smoking, was considered normal. There wasn't any sort of real effort to "cure" people of it. It was accepted that most people smoked. Yet now anyone who lights up and has difficulty quitting is diagnosed as addicted. The point is not so much that smoking wasn't addictive (I believe that it was and still is) but that people really didn't raise much of a stink about it.

And that's my problem here with video games. Look how many times (esp on Boundless) video games are given the bad rap. It's one of the questions that you screen a guy you want to go out with. It used to be considered an "anti-social" activity that only maladjusted youth did (Remember when people who played video games a lot were considered "losers"? Until it ended up being a billion-dollar industry that in some years made more money than the movie industry). If you list "video games" as a hobby, even if it's just casually, most people (esp Christians for some reason) view it as a vice, not a virtue.

This is NOT to say that video games can't be disruptive to one's social relationships. I agree that it has doomed more than its fair share of GPAs and marriages. But what I'm saying is that if one looks closely enough, you can find other activities which can be just as impactful. Compulsive buying/shopping. Web surfing/blogging. Sports. You lost your husband to video games? I'm sure there were just as many husbands lost to working overtime at jobs. Where's the outcry there?

As someone who has enjoyed playing video games for most of his life (from the homely Atari 2600 to the Xbox360's of today [which I don't have]) I will say that even though it can be a negative influence at times, it should not be blanketed as a whole as something "bad".

14. Mike Theemling said the following at 6:36 PM on Sep 19:

Correction to my last repsonse:

For example, take the many studies which reveals that chocolate "lights up" the same part of the brain as chocolate does...

It should say "chocolate 'lights up' the same part of the brain that cocaine does..."

The idea is that it's a fallacy to assume chocolate and cocaine are on the same playing field as heroine and cocaine.

15. Tamara said the following at 7:56 PM on Sep 19:

Is "The Psychology of Combating Stress, Depression and Addiction" a book? I'd really like to do more research in this area for the ministry I'm in, but I couldn't find that title. Can you recommend anything for further research on the topic of stress and addictions?

16. Chris said the following at 8:51 PM on Sep 19:

and some studies have shown that the same parts of the brain light up with both video game junkies and heroin addicts. No kidding!

One could use that as an argument to legalize heroin since video games are socially acceptable......;^)

17. Patricia said the following at 6:08 AM on Sep 20:

Eh, I agree that video games are often vilified while other forms of entertainment can be just as bad. Obviously video games are fine in moderation-as is TV, shopping, movies, jogging, eating dessert, and any one of numerous things that give us pleasure. When I have children, I would seriously consider getting rid of the television in our house. RIght now I have a TV but don't get any channels because I see no point in paying for cable and think I'm better off without TV. For children, TV, video games, etc can be damaging to their development if not used properly-but again the key is discernment.

18. Loris said the following at 9:17 AM on Sep 20:

My husband is not even a hardcore gamer as gamers would define themselves, but we have half a dozen systems and dozens of console games. In the early days of our marriage, I was definitely a game widow. It didn't matter what game. If it was fast paced and flashy, my man would plop down in front of it and sit mesmerized for hours, to my great annoyance. Finally, about a year ago, I started playing with him so I wouldn't feel left out. It was a fun thing we could do together but it also became its own problem because my husband would cut short dates and decline other activities so as not to miss a minute when he got home from work. World of Warcraft was mentioned earlier and that is the game he and I play. I would have to say that most addicting thing about it is the socializing. Guild chat and Ventrilo create a social world that is completely groundless, because no matter how much fun you have with your guildmates, you don't actually know them. Not to mention the huge expenditure of time. WoW has a timer that counts how long you've played each character. My level 70 druid on Venture Co. has now absorbed 15 days of my time in the last year. 15 24-hour days of my existence. That scares me. Sure, it was fun while it lasted, but I have now run out of things to do in the game and will probably not renew my subscription for the next month. So I'm wondering what I'm going to find to do with my husband to entertain us for the next year. I'm wishing we'd spent two full weeks of our lives reading to each other, hanging out with real friends, or whatnot.

On a related tangent, I wonder if the allure of video games corresponds to the high number of young people with variants of ADD and OCD these days. My husband has a touch of OCD and video games are a natural hobby for him because they are pretty much the only things in his world that move as fast as his brain does. I've noticed that everyone I know that has either of those disorders seems to be male and with no exceptions they are all gamers with varying levels of addiction. In fact, my husband is rather low on the addiction list compared to some of these men! I don't know what the actual statistics are, but that seems to explain to me why so many guys of my acquaintance are so into gaming and can't put it down.

As for addiction criteria, if your spouse, parents or friends think you're addicted, you probably are.

19. Lois said the following at 9:43 AM on Sep 20:

Wow...good post. I could point fingers at brothers and guy friends I have...until I realize that list could also apply to my internet use...ouch!

Thanks for the wake-up.

20. Seth said the following at 10:00 AM on Sep 20:

I was definatly addicted to video games for a couple of years. I always had to be the best and would just keep going and going. Eventually I saw how it was effecting my friends so I decided one day to quit so I did. It's amazing how much free time you have to pray, read your bible, build relationships when your not always watching tv or playing on your computer. God and people are what it's all about.

21. Athena said the following at 3:32 PM on Sep 20:

Speaking of addictions to the computer, I sometimes find myself leaving my email on for nearly the whole day. Gmail has this function of having new emails pop up the instant they are received. It has negatively affected my mood if, for example, I didn't receive a single email for the day, even though I know that's foolish. Perhaps that constitutes an addiction? Others may've had similar experiences with checking for comments on your blog, or leaving your instant messenger needlessly on for the whole day, and then that feeling of emptiness if there was no activity.

Addictons akin to compulsive email-checking are harder to fend off than video games in some ways, simply because we rely on email to do so many essential things.

I think the message we can come away with some of the addictions mentioned is our frustrations with being able to pleasantly connect with other people in the real world. Until we start making an effort again and be hopeful about making and keeping those connections, so many substitutes will always vie for our attention.

On a bright note, I have heard that the game Animal Crossing can be a wonderful tool for families whose members like video games but don't get to see each other often. For example, if the father works late and the kid is already asleep, he can switch on the game, play a little and leave a virtual letter for his kid's character in the game. Then, the next day after school, the kid can get to read what his dad wrote him! How about that for a healthy use of a video game!

22. John S. said the following at 2:35 AM on Sep 21:

I used to frequent an online Scrabble site, playing as many as five games a day. The thrill of landing my first seven-tile play got me hooked. It got to the point where I would begin anagramming random seven letter words during conversations, classes, even sermons. I quit not willfully but because of business - I just didn't have time in school, and it was a good thing too.
Now I have a list of websites that I visit every day (this weblog being one of them). I estimate it takes about one and a half hours away from each day - that's almost two full days a month. Not that they're not worthwhile sites, but they're still idle time in my book.
I think what we need is a deliberate commitment to change, not just a statement that we can do so. It reminds me of the joke of the mathematician who woke up to his fire alarm in the night, saw his extinguisher in the room, and fell asleep satisfied that a solution existed.

23. John said the following at 5:58 PM on Sep 21:

I have an addiction to thoughts, ideas, philosophy, apologetics, blogs, arguing, political news, the internet, TV and correcting error.

Now if I could just channel that energy towards God, Christ and the Holy Spirit...

24. John said the following at 6:00 PM on Sep 21:

I forgot to mention...but no addiction to video games.

25. Jo said the following at 1:18 AM on Sep 22:

Trin - I've done that too ('fasting' from things that I spend a lot of time/money on) - I think it's a really good thing to do. I've done it with buying clothes and listening to secular music (as a musician I found that one REALLY hard!). I agree with you that it's a good simple way of reassessing priorities, and physically choosing not to worship those things above Christ.

Re: the 'video games stimulate the same part of the brain as heroin' comment - it sounds such a shocking comparison on the surface, but surely this would only be an issue if it was a part of the brain that it was WRONG to stimulate, and I don't think anyone's suggested that (yet).

26. Jo said the following at 1:21 AM on Sep 22:

In fact, I think it's kinda like saying "Oh goodness, my favourite colour is the same as Hitler's was!!" - it doesn't make the colour evil; the comparison is erroneous. (Ooh I do like that word.)

27. terry said the following at 10:40 PM on Sep 22:

i have two friends who play World of Warcraft together. one is in california and the other is in texas. we've known each other for about 7 years.

they started playing WOW together about 4 years ago. i was catching up with one of them recently and she couldn't even remember our other friend's real name since she always thought of him as his online screenname. i mean, they weren't super deep friends but we did go to the same tiny church.

this is just a comment on how powerful gaming can take over life.

28. Adam said the following at 12:39 AM on Sep 23:

Some, if not a lot of video games, particularly online games are just plain fun. And me, being a selfish person driven to find happiness constantly, being that my flesh is weak, am drawn to video games. I used to be an addict and escaped away to video games mostly because I lived out in the sticks and all my friends were far away and I was too old for normal toys. That being said, since college, i've grown out of games and really can't stand playing for more than an hour a day because it feels like such a waste of time and i don't have fun with them anymore. I guess I played them so much in my youth, realized more of what I missed out on with socializing in college, and have since ceased spending so much time doing something that I will not be able to recall 1 week from now.

29. Beth said the following at 3:39 PM on Sep 23:

I've never played role-playing games, PlayStation, or similar. I'm not addicted to Solitaire or Minesweeper, either. It's been years since I even played a game of computer pinball, and that's something I do enjoy. But I do have my downfalls: email and forum-checking. There are three or four fora I keep up with, and I have to admit it is very possible to spend an entire day cycling between them and not getting any meaningful work done. I'm grateful Boundless isn't constantly updating its articles, so I don't waste too much time looking for new ones. It's always a good exercise to be without my laptop, or without broadband, and discover that life continues even without those pervasive connections.

30. Jo said the following at 2:17 PM on Sep 24:

Beth: The plural of forum is fora? I don't think I've heard anyone say that before.. you must be a REAL addict. ;)