When Christians Curse
by Suzanne Hadley Gosselin on 06/26/2007 at 12:22 PM
Ted's post on the misuse of God's name in "Evan Almighty" got quite a discussion going. Then today, I read Tim Challies' review of Grace (Eventually) by Anne LaMott. One of his criticisms of the book (and there are many) is LaMott's use of profanity. Challies writes:
Lamott has proven to have wide appeal, writing for Salon, the Los Angeles Times and a variety of other periodicals. It should be exciting to see a professed Christian writing for what is clearly a largely secular audience. Sadly, though, the spiritual insights shared by Lamott are more shocking or embarrassing than exciting and inspiring.
I think what is troubling about Lamott's flippancy with God's name, is that it speaks of a God who is neither worthy of fear (think Moses and the burning bush) nor extravagant love (think Mary pouring perfume on Jesus' feet). This clearly is not the God of the Bible. God tells us His name is to be proclaimed (Exodus 6:3), honored (Exodus 20:24), feared (Malachi 1:14) and revered (Malachi 4:2).
Consider Malachi 2:2: "If you do not listen, and if you do not set your heart to honor my name," says the LORD Almighty, "I will send a curse upon you, and I will curse your blessings. Yes, I have already cursed them, because you have not set your heart to honor me."
If, like me, you're tempted to wonder what the big deal is about uttering a particular word, consider the deeper issue of honor. Does LaMott's book convey proper honor, love and devotion for the God she claims to serve? Does it demonstrate that she has "set her heart to honor" God's name? Based on the passages Challies provides, I don't think it does.
God's name is a big deal. It is inseparable from His person and character. The way believers use God's name communicates to the world who they think He is. It's unfortunate when that message diminishes a God whose name has the power to save (Acts 4:12).
1. J-Twinkle said the following at 2:01 PM on Jun 26:
Then, my question, Suzanne, is this:
What do you do about it that reflects God's love without misrespesenting the gospel of Christ or taking a stand? The truth is clear: We must honor and reverently respect the name of God. But where is the application of the love and grace of God in this?
2. Joseph said the following at 2:52 PM on Jun 26:
I think this is a reflection of the current Christian attitudes. Although disappointing I think it is fair to say the majority of the population Christian and non-Christian curse in their daily lives.
I have often found that by simply not cursing people notice the difference that there is something more than being a good person in their eyes, because even today the "good people" and "boy scouts" include cursing as regular dialogue.
On one side for a professed Christian to openly curse God's name in a published work it might find more common ground, perhaps it is moments of anger or it might be cavalier disrespect, one would have to look into the conotation of the actual usage. The other side is that it is what it is. Irreverance, dishonor and all those other negative adjectives.
I think people have a "Buddy Christ" image in their head, which is helpful in knowing the personnal Christ, but many neglect to reconcile that with the image of Christ in Isaiah 63.
3. JMarie said the following at 3:18 PM on Jun 26:
J-Twinkle - I took this post and Ted's post more as challenges to reflect on one's own use of language, not as issues of "taking a stand". Obviously a non-believer isn't going to have the same reference point for language. I suppose it could be a matter to confront another Christian about if you worry his or her heart isn't where it should be...rather like Ted and Suzanne are doing in this blog, no? But I can't imagine confronting just anyone on the street about their swearing...reminds me too much of elementary school. Perhaps you could see showing reverence for G-d in your speech as a way of witnessing, though, even if you never do spell it out for people.
4. Jennica said the following at 3:41 PM on Jun 26:
J-Twinkle,
As far as I can understand from your previous comment, you are asking where God's love and grace applies to those of us who have not always honoured God with our mouths (which is everyone). I think it is in the same place as it is for all sin. It is always there, ready to meet us when we turn from our sin, ready to receive us in absolute love and forgiveness. Sin is sin, when something separates you from intimacy with Christ, you need to deal with that. Poor choices in language is capable of that, this is something I struggle with and strive to be honourable in. God's grace applies when we come to Him with a humble attitude wanting to do better. He knows the motives of our hearts (Proverbs 16:2) and understands our struggle. His grace and love are present just as they are in every other aspect of our lives.
This is what I understood you to be asking, please correct me if I am wrong.
5. code said the following at 4:35 PM on Jun 26:
I've found in academic circles that using near-miss substitutes does more to hinder than to help... which begs the question of whether the mental and linguistic gymnastics it takes to express certain things commonly said by means of so-called "profanity" are worth the trouble.
Ultimately, since words themselves aren't sin, we're left to apply the spiritual discipline of discernment to matters such as this. What is wrong to say and what is right to say is a matter of context, audience, attitudes, motives, and general hear-condition (for speech is the overflow of the heart as Matthew tells us in his gospel).
What I'm getting at is, at the most basic level, this: It can be far worse to say "I love you" than to say something quote-unquote profane to someone, according to the context of course.
Speech isn't the black and white issue we'd like it to be, at least when it comes to "swear words", I'm not including misuse of the Lord's name or of Christ's name in this conclusion whatsoever.
6. elizabeth said the following at 4:50 PM on Jun 26:
this is ridiculous. even though i choose not to curse as a practice, i think that lamott's writing accomplishes two things very well:
first, it is honest and not all polished up to make her look as though she's perfect. she's not perfect. it's not a secret.
secondly, what a great message to a non-believing reader! the christian community as a whole does a 'wonderful' job of holding up perfect lifestyles, believing that this alone will speak the truth of the gospel to the world. i think lamott steps into a void by voicing her imperfections and doubts, thereby, perhaps, making the gospel more of a faith issue, rather than an outward appearance issue.
7. Suzanne said the following at 5:25 PM on Jun 26:
J-Twinkle,
"What do you do about it?"
I search my own heart and ask the Lord to reveal to me areas of my speech that are not honoring Him. More than that, I look to see if I have set my heart to honor Him. This blog is about my words and heart proclaiming and revering Him. And as far as grace and love, He has those in abundance for me when I fail. And I praise Him for it!
8. Molly said the following at 5:47 PM on Jun 26:
This debate regarding whether or not curse words are acceptable reminds me of my freshman year at my community college. In one of my 101 classes, I had a professor who stated in his introductory speech that he was from the 60's and proud of it. I knew then that I was in trouble! The following classes felt like something out of a PG-13 movie. After enduring quite of few of his profanities, I went up to him and with respect asked him to reconsider his choice of words. I told him I was a Christian and found it offensive and just wanted to inform him that there are some college students who don't think it's cool for a professor to utter such words. He was suprised to say the least, but after that whenever he was about to say something, he'd abrubtly stop and switch to something more mild. "Darn" was the most frequently said word after that. I struggled with talking with him for a while, but in the end I'm glad I did. To my suprise my grade didn't suffer for it!
9. Greg said the following at 9:41 PM on Jun 26:
Actually, if someone you are talking to uses God's name in vain or even as a curse, that might just be a great opportunity to start up a real conversation about God :)
10. J-Twinkle said the following at 7:16 AM on Jun 27:
Yes, Jennica, that is what I am talking about. I agree with Joseph that the perception of a "Buddy Christ" is pervasive. However, I always thought true friendship is grounded in love and respect and truth, meaning that real friends will call each other on conduct, behavior, and/or attitudes that are not right. That is, of course if the friends profess to live by the same standards.(I'm not expecting an unbeliever to have any judicious restraint over his tongue).
And though I agree we have forgotten that we serve the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords who more than deserves our reverential respect, I still want to keep in mind that He is merciful and full of grace and love despite our shortcomings.
11. Lorie said the following at 10:52 AM on Jun 27:
Elizabeth,
I hear what you're saying about the need for believers not to pretend to be "shiny, happy people" when we are, in actuality, sinful, doubt-ridden, fearful individuals sometimes just struggling to make it through the day.
At the same time, the true gospel is one of freedom, peace, hope and joy. And that should be evident in our lives and how we speak about even our struggles, doubts, frustrations, etc. Our lives, attitudes and words should seem odd and out of place, given the circumstances, to those who don't put their faith in the gospel.
Admittedly, I am not familiar with LaMott's work, and have only read the excerpts referenced above. But from those excerpts I don't readily see any evidence of peace and joy in God's sovereignty over world events or a submission to the authority of His word and ways over what makes sense to us.
Yes, we should be honest and transparent, with each other and with the world. But what people see and hear should look and sound more like Christ than like the world. You know?
12. Joel Bain said the following at 12:00 PM on Jun 27:
My current book that I am writing contains curses, swears and the such, but one area of vulgar language I do not want to dabble in is using God's name as a curse or whatever. As far as the other ones go, I think it is silly to think that you can write a book about real people in a real society and expect them to be believeable characters, especially when they are not Christians characters, without using foul language.
Moral dilemas in Christian Lit are completely lacking as Christian writers tend to not want to write a sinful character. Or at the very least, they don't want to give book space to it, but will instead, often merely refer to it as having happened in the past, ie. "Jack's wife had an affair with another man two years ago. They still hadn't completely reconciled." Seems like it isn't very often that that would be given bookspace in Christian Lit this days, even if it had merit.
13. Michelle Myers said the following at 1:36 PM on Jun 27:
This is probably off topic from what has been discussed in previous comments, but something in particular stood out to me in the blog. Like Suzanne noticed, Tim Challies said:
"Lamott has proven to have wide appeal, writing for Salon, the Los Angeles Times and a variety of other periodicals. It should be exciting to see a professed Christian writing for what is clearly a largely secular audience. Sadly, though, the spiritual insights shared by Lamott are more shocking or embarrassing than exciting and inspiring."
That's very disappointing for me because, as an aspiring journalist, I want to be able to look up to those Christian journalists who are in the mass media field. I don't expect them to write "God is love" or "Believe in Jesus" in every story, but I do expect them to stand out in the way they conduct themselves in the office AND in the themes they reveal in their stories. Sure, most of the time that won't happen. But in this case, she could have put more effort into separating herself from the world with her insights from a, hopefully, Christian worldview.
I'm only 19, but I hope that when I find myself in her position, I'll be able to represent the Christian circle to the best of my ability.
14. Ashley said the following at 7:19 PM on Jun 27:
Mildly related: I recently attended a gay pride event to serve, meet and share Jesus with people. The nature of the event caused it to be protested by several "street preachers." I sat down with a group of seven girls, six in their teens and one that couldn't have been more than 11 years old.
Not long into our dialog, one of the girls, 16, asked me my opinion on the street preachers; then steamrolled on to tell me how one of them had told her to her face that she was sinning and had to repent of her sins, theoretically in the name of Jesus -- but devoid of all grace. After she walked away and he believed she was out of hearing range, he began talking a stream of profanity about her to another man protesting the event with him.
That man and his profanity did more to damage an already injured-by-the-church young woman than most people do in a year.
15. Leah said the following at 11:54 PM on Jun 27:
elizabeth, you said "what a great message to a non-believing reader".
Or NOT!!
Christians who act just like any other person are proving just that- they are no different to anyone else, so why would anyone else want to be a Christian? We are called to be DIFFERENT. We are called NOT to use the Lord's name in vain. To do so, then be repentant is one thing- to do so, and in front of a large audience, acting like it is ok, is an entirely different thing. It has always been my- and my friends'- lack of cursing that has made people go "What is different about you?" or "Why don't you swear?" or "Why don't you say 'oh my god'?"
If you DO say those things, people won't think there is anything different about you... just pass you by as another person.
Certainly, we, and lamott, are not perfect. But we should try our best to be.
16. Don said the following at 2:49 AM on Jun 28:
I felt convicted by this. I've really started paying attention to how I talk. I don't usually use actual curse words, but the substitute ones are really just as bad.
17. Julia said the following at 8:27 AM on Jun 28:
Doesn't the Bible say that "the world will know them by their love?"
I think that we really need to reconsider what we are talking about here. The issue is not so much one of words as it is of the intent behind them (as other posters have already mentioned.)
We should not judge those in the world who cannot control their tongues. Instead, we should be showing them love and quietly setting an example of Christ. Sometimes, we lose sight of the real goal and instead pick on the "little things" like smoking, swearing, etc. This really comes across as petty to people in the world who are searching.
We should correct our brothers and sisters in Christ in love, not in offense or anger or self-righteousness. Maybe though, especially for newer Christians, we could show a little more mercy and let some things slide. We certainly should never publically humiliate someone who is not intentionally trying to offend us.
At the same time, Christians are called to integrity in their speech and how we speak should reflect what (actually who) is in our hearts.
Swearing is offensive to some (as are minor curse words) and this is part of the reason why we should eliminate them from our vocabulary. We must never insist on our "right to freedom of speech" at the expense of someone else. How is it showing love when we are offending our brothers and sisters?
So here is my conclusion: I will show mercy to those who cannot control their tongue, I will gently and privately correct those brothers and sisters who are in need of correction, I will refrain from offending my brothers and sisters by eliminating curse words from my language, and I will not be angry when others correct me.
18. Jeff said the following at 9:31 AM on Jun 29:
I love Anne, though. She's one of my favorite living writers.