I apologize but ... by Motte Brown on 09/05/2006 at 11:12 AM

I call what Ted writes about in his most recent post, the qualification apology. We place the responsibility not only on the sinned-against, but on the circumstances surrounding our bad behavior. "I'm sorry I yelled at you, but I had a bad day at work."

Blaming our circumstances lessens our culpability, in our eyes and in the eyes of others. In Carolyn McCulley's recent article You Made Me Sin, she writes that our actions are an outflow of what's in our hearts.

In the same way, when we get squeezed by the circumstances of life (an inevitability), we ooze the overflow of our hearts. We usually don't like what we see, so we blame the squeeze. We blame the circumstances. "I wouldn't have reacted that way if I hadn't been tired." Or, "I only said that because I was hot, thirsty, and uncomfortable." That's our default setting: blame the circumstances.

But Jesus tells us the overflow is what's already in our hearts. Being tired, hot, thirsty, or uncomfortable are only "revealers"; they aren't the reason we react in anger. We're angry because anger has taken root in our hearts.

Jesus not only told us, he modeled it. As the Holy Spirit led Jesus in the desert to be tempted we read that he ate nothing for forty days. Though without food and comfort, and being tempted by the devil, He did not sin.

Let us be mindful of this the next time we excuse our irritability on something like ... being hungry.